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If Jesus had been killed twenty years ago, Catholic school children would be wearing little electric chairs around their necks instead of crosses.
Lenny Bruce
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Lenny Bruce
Age: 40 †
Born: 1925
Born: October 13
Died: 1966
Died: August 3
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Screenwriter
Singer
Writer
Mineola
New York
Children
Catholic
Necks
Years
Instead
Chairs
Would
Jesus
Electric
Christ
Wearing
Around
Killed
School
Twenty
Littles
Twenties
Aggravation
Little
Crosses
Catholicism
More quotes by Lenny Bruce
Satire is tragedy plus time.
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The role of a comedian is to make the audience laugh, at a minimum of once every fifteen seconds.
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Let me tell you the truth: The truth is what is. And what should be is a fantasy a terrible, terrible lie that someone gave the people long ago.
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Life is a four-letter word.
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Satire is tragedy plus time. You give it enough time, the public, the reviewers will allow you to satirize it. Which is rather ridiculous, when you think about it.
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I tried the religion scam in Miami, so I know how hard that gig is. But, if you can get it to work, starting your own religion is a license to print money.
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All my humor is based upon destruction and despair. If the whole world were tranquil, without disease and violence, I’d be standing on the breadline right in back of J. Edgar Hoover.
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I think it's about time we gave up religion and got back to God.
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If something about the human body disgusts you, the fault lies with the manufacturer.
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Once the country was settled and built, the bosses changed the order from a stack of educated workers to a barrel of minimum wage lottery dreamers.
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There is only what is and that's it. What should be is a dirty lie.
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You can't do anything with anybody's body to make it dirty to me. Six people, eight people, one person - you can do only one thing to make it dirty: kill it. Hiroshima was dirty.
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Communism is like one big phone company.
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I won't say ours was a tough school, but we had our own coroner. We used to write songs like, What I'm going to do if I grow up.
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All my humor is based upon destruction and despair.
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Trying to figure things out was my gig. Without the human condition, there's no struggle, no pain and that means no laughter.
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I'm sure that half the buzz from smoking grass was the fact that it was so illegal.
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Freedom of speech is a two way street, man. You have the right to say whatever you want and the Boss has a right to tell the police to arrest you.
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Once you sleep on feathers you can't go back to sleeping on the floor.
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I am influenced by every second of my waking hour.
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