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Alex is dead, do you hear me? All of that-what we felt, what it meant- that's done now, okay? Buried. Blown away.

Lauren Oliver

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Lauren Oliver
Age: 42
Born: 1982
Born: November 8
Author
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Westchester County
New York
Okay
Dead
Hear
Felt
Away
Alex
Done
Blown
Buried
Meant

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I guess there are some things you never get used to.
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And for a moment―for a split second―everything else falls away, the whole pattern and order of my life, and a huge joy crests in my chest. I am no one, and I owe nothing to anybody, and my life is my own.
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Requiem has been controversial because people dont feel I gave it closure.
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It's the way he says my name: like music.
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The priests and the scientists are right about one thing: At our heart, at our base, we are no better than animals.
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Time jumps. It leaps. It pours away like water through fingers.
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I am now officially married to Fred Hargrove. Nothing will ever be the same.
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This is what hatred is. It will feed you and at the same time turn you to rot.
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No wonder the regulators decided on segregation of boys and girls: Otherwise, it would have been a nightmare, this feeling angry and self-conscious and confused and annoyed all the time.
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Stupid how the mind will try to distract itself.
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I have had to give up so much, so many selves and lives already. I have grown up and out of the rubble of my old lives, of things and people I have cared for.
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Some things are better left buried and forgotten.
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Alex loved books. He was the one who first introduced me to poetry. That's another reason I can't read anymore.
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Of course. That's what people do in a disordered world, a world of freedom and choice: they leave when they want. They disappear, they come back, they leave again. And you are left to pick up the pieces on your own.
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I get that rush that comes when you know you're doing something wrong and are getting away with it, like stealing from the school cafeteria of getting tipsy at a family holiday without anyone knowing it.
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Be honest: Are you surprised that I didn't realize sooner? Are you surprised that it took me so long to even /think/ the word -- death? Dying? Dead? Do you think I was being stupid? Naive? Try not to judge. Remember that we're the same, you and me. I thought I would live forever too.
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