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Grief is like sinking, like being buried.

Lauren Oliver

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Lauren Oliver
Age: 42
Born: 1982
Born: November 8
Author
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Westchester County
New York
Sinking
Buried
Grief
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I don't know how i stay on my feet, why i dont just shatter into dust right there, why my heart keeps beating when i want it so badly to stop
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The question was: Will you meet me tomorrow? And the word was: Yes.
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Mice? Fine. Flying mice? Not so fine.
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My heart is fluid and soaring. There's no longer any space between heartbeats.
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Everyone just wasting time because they have so much of it to waste, minutes slipping by on who's with who and did you hear.
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It was a bird. A bird struggling through stickiness: a bird coated in paint, floundering in its nest, splashing color everywhere. Red. Red. Red. Dozens of them: black feathers coated thickly with crimson-colored paint, fluttering among the branches. Red means run.
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It occurs to me that for a long time she has been doing her own version of resisting.
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Is this freedom? Is it happiness? I don't know. I don't care anymore. It is different--it is being alive.
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I know some of you are Thinking maybe I deserved it. But before you start pointing Fringers, let me ask you Is what I did really so bad? So bad I deserved to die? So bad I deserved to die like that? Is what I did really much worse Then what anybody else does? Is it really so much worse Than what you do?
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This is what I want. This is the only thing I've ever wanted. Everything else—every single second of every single day that has come before this very moment, this kiss—has meant nothing.
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The kidnapping, the kiss. I brought him here, after all. I rescue him an pulled him into this new life, a life of freedom and feeling.
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Be honest: Are you surprised that I didn't realize sooner? Are you surprised that it took me so long to even /think/ the word -- death? Dying? Dead? Do you think I was being stupid? Naive? Try not to judge. Remember that we're the same, you and me. I thought I would live forever too.
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We wanted the freedom to love. We wanted the freedom to choose. Now we have to fight for it.
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And how she looked at me like I could save her from everything bad in he world. This was my secret: she was the one who saved me
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Po flickered. Thank you? it repeated. What is that? Liesl thought. It means, You were wonderful, she said. It means, I couldn't have done it without you.
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Even the greatest movements on earth, have their beginnings with something small.
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Love. I love you. I’ll always love you, my love. You are the love of my life.
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people do terrible things, sometimes, for the best reasons.
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only when it rains. and sometimes, too, when i remember.
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I need to live my life in the light of their deaths. I need to live.
Lauren Oliver