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For the first time in a long time, I actually look at her. I've always thought Lena was pretty, but now it occurs to me that at some point - last summer? last year? - she became beautiful.

Lauren Oliver

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Lauren Oliver
Age: 42
Born: 1982
Born: November 8
Author
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Westchester County
New York
First
Point
Long
Last
Lena
Years
Actually
Occurs
Always
Beautiful
Summer
Time
Thought
Became
Look
Pretty
Firsts
Year
Looks
Lasts

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Popularity's a weird thing. You can't really define it, and it's not cool to talk about, but you know it when you see it. Like a lazy eye, or porn.
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people do terrible things, sometimes, for the best reasons.
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For a second I feel a rush of sadness: for the horizons that vanish behind us, for the people we leave behind, the tiny-doll selves that get stored away and ultimately buried.
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The first time I saw you, at the Governor, I handn't been to watch the birds at the border in years. But that's what you reminded me of. You were jumping up, and you were yelling something, and your hair was coming loose from your ponytail, and you were so fast... He shakes his head. Just a flash, and then you were gone, Exactly like a bird.
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Nothing exists but him.
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I'm not scared, if that's what you're wondering. The moment of death is full of sound and warmth and light shooting away, arcing up and up and up, and if singing were a feeling it would be this, this light, this lifting, like laughing... The rest you have to find out for yourself.
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i suppose that's the secret, if you're ever wishing for things to back the way they were. You just have to look up.
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Feelings aren't forever. Time waits for no one, but progress waits for man to enact it.
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Like I've been sketched by an amateur artist: if you don't look too closely, it's all right, but start focusing and all the smudges and mistakes become really obvious.
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I didn't realize then what a privilege that was: to be bored with your best friend to have time to waste.
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I've been so used to thinking of what the borders are keeping out that I haven't considered that they're also penning us in.
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He's stuck with me and I'm stuck with him. We're stuck. That's what growing up is all about, I guess.
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...and once at Hana's house, when we stole some blackberry liqueur from her parents' liquor cabinet and drank until the ceiling started spinning overhead. Hana was laughing and giggling, but I didn't like it, didn't like the sweet sick taste in my mouth or the way my thoughts seemed to break apart like a mist in the sun.
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We can never understand. We can only try, fumbling our way through the tunneled places, reaching for light.
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I think of Grace and feel a sharp pain in my chest.
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I don't love you, Lena. Do you hear me? I never love you.
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I'll find you, he says, watching me with the eyes I remember. I won't let you go again
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No one can tell us no. No one can make us stop. We have picked each other and the rest of the world can go to hell.
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If you cross a line and nothing happens, the line loses meaning.
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I know some of you are Thinking maybe I deserved it. But before you start pointing Fringers, let me ask you Is what I did really so bad? So bad I deserved to die? So bad I deserved to die like that? Is what I did really much worse Then what anybody else does? Is it really so much worse Than what you do?
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