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The seeds are tiny, unborn things, and I resent them. They'll be planted and they'll grow into exactly what they're meant to be.
Lauren DeStefano
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Lauren DeStefano
Age: 40
Born: 1984
Born: October 13
Author
Novelist
Connecticut
United States
Resent
Seeds
Tiny
Meant
Exactly
Grow
Grows
Planted
Things
Unborn
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You can't be afraid. You can be sad if you like. You can be angry. But it's the fear that'll freeze you in place.
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We'll squeeze every second that we can from our lives, because we're young, and we have plenty of years to grow. We'll grow until we're braver. We'll grow until our bones ache and our skin wrinkles and our hair goes white, and until our hearts decide, at last, that it's time to stop.
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Someday I'll tell you all of it, I say. I'd like that, he says. No, I say. I promise you won't.
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It doesn't matter how much his mother loves him love is not enough to keep any of us alive.
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I start trying to stay unconscious. The problem with this is that no amount of willpower can change the reality.
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And everywhere girls, tumbling from trees like orange blossoms and hitting the earth with sickening thuds. They crack open.
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She's been conned, ruined, left for dead, and she's not going to forgive any of it. She will soldier on, if only out of spite.
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Good night, sweetheart, he says. Good bye, sweetheart, I say. And it's so casual, so innocent that he doesn't suspect a thing.
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You can try to please everyone and risk accomplishing nothing, or go for your dreams and risk pissing a few people off.
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I can hear my brother's voice in my head. Your problem is that you're too emotional. But how can I not be emotional, Rowan? How can I not care?
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I've done it all before, I tell myself, and I can do it again. Trust is the strongest weapon.
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I see an ocean that’s spilled out of a wineglass, its body clear and sparkling and folding over itself. I see a ribbon of sand.
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Life is much different from the days when there were lilies in my mother’s garden, and all my secrets fit into a paper cup.
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