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I wish I had a memory of that first violent shove, the shock of cold air, the sting of oxygen into new lungs. Everyone should remember being born. It doesn't seem fair that we only remember dying.
Lauren DeStefano
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Lauren DeStefano
Age: 39
Born: 1984
Born: October 13
Author
Novelist
Connecticut
United States
Firsts
Cold
Fairs
First
Memories
Fair
Wish
Violent
Everyone
Memory
Shove
Born
Air
Sting
Doesn
Birth
Oxygen
Seems
Dying
Lungs
Remember
Seem
Shock
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When I am writing anything in general, I just want to tell the story that exists in my head I don't try to write a parable or make a point.
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But I know all the things you're too sweet to know.
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Childhood is a long, long road, from which that dark whispering forest of death seems an impossible destination.
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It doesn't matter how much his mother loves him love is not enough to keep any of us alive.
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I think humans have always been desperate. I think it has always been about doing something awful if it might help, when the only other option is death. Maybe that's what being a parent is supposed to feel like.
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There's a world out there that nobody has bothered to promise her.
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Don't you miss it? I say. Being free. He laughs.
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Tell freedom I said hello.
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It's best to let her go, he says. No, no, that's wrong. It's never right to give up on someone.
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I miss something I never even had.
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Real’ is a dirty word in this place.
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It's the silence I imagine in the rest of the world, the silence of an endless ocean and uninhabitable island, a silence that can be seen from space.
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We are stronger than we've credited ourselves to be. We have been the victims and the witnesses. We have said a lifetime of good-byes.
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So many of the things I've wanted are the things I've been taught to fear.
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The only characters I ever don't like are ones that leave no impression on me. And I don't write characters that leave no impression on me.
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It was a terrible decision, and I confess I'd make it again.
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A party in the orange grove. The pain on Linden's face is immediate. I am unwavering. He has cost me more pain than I will ever be able to repay.
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