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Gabriel's voice can reach me anywhere. Even in a hurricane.
Lauren DeStefano
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Lauren DeStefano
Age: 40
Born: 1984
Born: October 13
Author
Novelist
Connecticut
United States
Gabriel
Hurricane
Hurricanes
Anywhere
Reach
Voice
Even
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And everywhere girls, tumbling from trees like orange blossoms and hitting the earth with sickening thuds. They crack open.
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There is a silence so great that I can hear the ice crystals cracking and falling from eyelashes of girls who will never blink again.
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I wish I had a memory of that first violent shove, the shock of cold air, the sting of oxygen into new lungs. Everyone should remember being born. It doesn't seem fair that we only remember dying.
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Even things that aren't broken can be fixed.
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I think humans have always been desperate. I think it has always been about doing something awful if it might help, when the only other option is death. Maybe that's what being a parent is supposed to feel like.
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who once had dreams of saving the world, now laughs at anyone who tries.
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For males twenty-five is the fatal age. For women it's twenty. We are all dropping like flies.
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Good night, sweetheart, he says. Good bye, sweetheart, I say. And it's so casual, so innocent that he doesn't suspect a thing.
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I lost everyone I loved, I tell him. I wait for him to look at me, and then I add, The day I met you.
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I watch the ashes swim around like dandelion puffs, making swirls where bodies and walls once stood.
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I want to make a world more magical than my own. I don't care if it makes sense, I don't care if it's ridiculed or if, rather than a neat round planet that goes around forever, it ends with a cliff that falls off into nothing. I want to have my eyes wide open, and I want to see this room and at the same time, not this room.
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Tell freedom I said hello.' 'If I happen to see it, I will.
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There is a dark place calling to me, but I will not go just yet. I know I can't return from it.
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Don't you miss it? I say. Being free. He laughs.
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I figured it out eventually, she says. She's sitting on the edge of the gurney again her features slowly materialize as my vision clears. It's momentum. What? I whisper. The feeling returning to my lips, spreading out to my fingertips and toes. Momentum, she repeats. You can't just stand there if you want something to fly. You have
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You have a way of looking at things. You make it seem as though everything's going to be okay. I can't imagine a more dangerous thing to have than hope like yours.
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So many of the things I've wanted are the things I've been taught to fear.
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I've done it all before, I tell myself, and I can do it again. Trust is the strongest weapon.
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Fall has always been my favorite season. The time when everything bursts with its last beauty, as if nature had been saving up all year for the grand finale.
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Maybe hope isn't the most dangerous thing a person can have. Maybe love is.
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