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My sisters were in that van.

Lauren DeStefano

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Lauren DeStefano
Age: 40
Born: 1984
Born: October 13
Author
Novelist
Connecticut
United States
Vans
Sisters

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She would do anything, anything to belong to his son after a lifetime of belonging to no one at all.
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I never wanted to live forever, she says. I just wanted enough time.
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Eventually I realize that I am holding on to him just as tightly as he holds on to me. And here we are: two small dying things, as the world ends around us like falling autumn leaves.
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There’s a limit to how much living can be done in a life without freedom.
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I think humans have always been desperate. I think it has always been about doing something awful if it might help, when the only other option is death. Maybe that's what being a parent is supposed to feel like.
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I want to make a world more magical than my own. I don't care if it makes sense, I don't care if it's ridiculed or if, rather than a neat round planet that goes around forever, it ends with a cliff that falls off into nothing. I want to have my eyes wide open, and I want to see this room and at the same time, not this room.
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There is a dark place calling to me, but I will not go just yet. I know I can't return from it.
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Love is not enough to keep any of us alive.
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Things will get worse before they get better.
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Maybe what frightens us about the edge isn't our fear of morality, but the thoughts it leads us to have.
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The only characters I ever don't like are ones that leave no impression on me. And I don't write characters that leave no impression on me.
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There is a silence so great that I can hear the ice crystals cracking and falling from eyelashes of girls who will never blink again.
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It's quiet for a while, and then Rowan says We could talk now. We're alone out here. No walls. There are always walls. I say.
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I wish I had a memory of that first violent shove, the shock of cold air, the sting of oxygen into new lungs. Everyone should remember being born. It doesn't seem fair that we only remember dying.
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and I've always known it, the way I love a song I hear for the first time, even before I know all the words, the way I love my favorite color, and the way that the train would speed past my bedroom when it was very quiet and I'd feel it in my stomach rushing through me. I love you in a way that I've never felt needed to be said.
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When I am writing anything in general, I just want to tell the story that exists in my head I don't try to write a parable or make a point.
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Poor kid,' Jenna says, and rolls her eyes toward me for a moment. Then she returns to her book. 'She doesn't even understand what kind of place this is.
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The thing about hope is that it doesn't go away even when it serves no purpose.
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There's a world out there that nobody has bothered to promise her.
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Life is much different from the days when there were lilies in my mother’s garden, and all my secrets fit into a paper cup.
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