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I COULD CARE LESS ABOUT CRITICS, LIKE I SAID THEY DONT BUY TICKETS.
Larry the Cable Guy
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Larry the Cable Guy
Age: 61
Born: 1963
Born: February 17
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Singer-Songwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Pawnee City
Nebraska
Daniel Lawrence Whitney
Tickets
Dont
Critics
Less
Care
Like
More quotes by Larry the Cable Guy
What I do onstage, there's maybe .0001 percent of the population that acts like that. I talk like that because it makes me laugh, and because I know a couple of people that talk like that. They're really that Southern. And they do funny things. I love 'em they're awesome. They're good people.
Larry the Cable Guy
I've always thought if you don't like what somebody says, don't hang out with that person. Why do you have to complain about it? Here's the thing. I don't hang out with, and I'm not friends with anybody that would offend me or I think offends me or lives a different way than I do.
Larry the Cable Guy
I had a buddy of mine call up the other day, all upset 'cause he slept with his third cousin. And I'm like, Man, if it upsets you that much, quit countin' them!
Larry the Cable Guy
Every July, I look forward to taping a Christmas show - in July in Nashville. In 98-degree weather. I love it.
Larry the Cable Guy
Blaming guns for killing people is like blaming pencils for bad spelling
Larry the Cable Guy
I don't judge people by their accent, or how they word things, or how grammatically correct their speech is. Some of the smartest men in the world couldn't spell. I judge a person by their character.
Larry the Cable Guy
When I look at my audience, I can tell better who's in the crowd and the kind of joke I shouldn't do. It's just complicated. I guess I sift through to make sure these jokes are a little different with not such a harsh edge to them. That's pretty much how I handle the crowd.
Larry the Cable Guy
I have a basic theorem as to how I do my jokes. Growing up, I knew when to cross the line and when not to cross the line. It's the same with my comedy. I know what my audience will take and how much they won't take. I can't give you a formula for it. It's my own personal formula inside my head. Somebody else's might be different.
Larry the Cable Guy
Remember, half the people you know are below average.
Larry the Cable Guy
I saw a sign one time that said 'hemorrhoids awareness week' at the doctor's office. Let me tell you, if you got hemorrhoids, I'm sure you are aware of it. You don't need a sign to tell anybody about it.
Larry the Cable Guy
I THINK ITS COOL THAT OTHER CROWDS LIKE WHAT I DO. HOWEVER IVE ALWAYS HAD A GOOD MIX OF PEOPLE AT MY SHOWS. I STARTED DOING THINGS ON RADIO ON ROCK MARKETS AND ALTERNATIVE MARKETS. IVE ALWAYS BEEN A COUNTRY TYPE ACT HOWEVER I STARTED WITH THE ROCK MARKET. IM VERY INTERCHANGEABLE.
Larry the Cable Guy
I pretty much live on my tour bus.I do well around 300 shows a year. A lot of times I will do two shows a night.
Larry the Cable Guy
I can have different opinions with anybody. I can still be a friend with that person.
Larry the Cable Guy
I don't take myself too seriously. I enjoy what I do. I enjoy making people laugh.
Larry the Cable Guy
I'm so sick of gay this, gay that. I could care less. It ain't affecting my life at all.
Larry the Cable Guy
I know I don't want to take the Lord's name in vain, and I don't want to drop any F-bombs.
Larry the Cable Guy
Its nice if people can finally loosen up a little bit and just go out laugh at silliness. I mean, people take themselves way too seriously sometimes.
Larry the Cable Guy
I'm defending free speech pretty much all over the place because you still have freedom of speech.
Larry the Cable Guy
I don't know why people get so bent out of shape over stuff people say.
Larry the Cable Guy
I split time between Nebraska and Florida. I'll come to Nebraska in the summertime and stay through Thanksgiving and then I go back to Florida because I have family in both places. One of the reasons I got the place in Nebraska is I've always wanted to live back in Nebraska.
Larry the Cable Guy
