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Sometimes you have to rely on sex and bodily functions.
Larry David
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Larry David
Age: 77
Born: 1947
Born: July 2
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Director
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Sheepshead Bay
Brooklyn
Lawrence Gene David
Lawrence Gene Larry David
the greatest man alive
Bodily
Functions
Rely
Function
Sex
Sometimes
More quotes by Larry David
All of a sudden I discovered that I'm allergic to caviar. It was the perfect metaphor for my life. When I was only able to afford bad caviar, I could certainly eat my fill of it.
Larry David
I like to be quiet, and let people find me rather than having to shout at them.
Larry David
You write about what you know.
Larry David
I had a wonderful childhood, which is tough because it's hard to adjust to a miserable adulthood.
Larry David
I don't think anyone really is interested in reading about my emotional state. It's not even interesting to me.
Larry David
I still think of that guy I was without a wife or kids, and I still want to entertain that guy. The lonely guy, the frustrated guy, the guy with no money - this is the guy who needs to laugh.
Larry David
The addition of nuts in salad... I always find to be beneficial.
Larry David
The closest I ever came to death was masturbating with a 104-degree temperature.
Larry David
You can't do anything in life. The social barriers in life are so intense and horrific that every encounter is just fraught with so many problems and dread. Every social situation is a potential nightmare.
Larry David
I learned the first night that IHOP's not the place to order fish.
Larry David
Pretty good. Pretttttttty, pretttttttttty, pretttttty good.
Larry David
It's always good to take something that's happened in your life and make something of it comedically.
Larry David
The best situation is being a single parent. The best part about is that you get time off, too, because the kids are with their mom, so it's the best of both worlds. There's a lot to be said for it.
Larry David
And eventually as I kept writing it, something emerged that was not quite me but a version of me.
Larry David
I'm Larry David. I happen to enjoy wearing women's panties.
Larry David
I'm not a person who embraces challenges. I run from challenges. I break world records running from challenges.
Larry David
Hitler really ruined that mustache for everybody. It’s really an interesting mustache, but now, no one can wear it.
Larry David
A place to go - that's what my mother always instilled in me. You need a place to go. And you're worthless unless you have a place to go.
Larry David
Golf and dating don't mix.
Larry David
Do not degrade me in the military uniform I wear for it represents the love I have for my country, and the sacrifices myself and millions of other American soldiers make everyday to protect the freedom we enjoy by living in the United States of America.
Larry David
