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If I tried to flirt with a woman and she didn't know who I was, she would run away.
Larry David
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Larry David
Age: 77
Born: 1947
Born: July 2
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Director
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Sheepshead Bay
Brooklyn
Lawrence Gene David
Lawrence Gene Larry David
the greatest man alive
Flirt
Flirting
Tried
Woman
Running
Away
Didn
Would
More quotes by Larry David
Most practical jokes, I'll feel too bad for the other person so I'll stop just before the punchline.
Larry David
I'd like to start a family, but you have to have a date first.
Larry David
The best situation is being a single parent. The best part about is that you get time off, too, because the kids are with their mom, so it's the best of both worlds. There's a lot to be said for it.
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I don't think anyone really is interested in reading about my emotional state. It's not even interesting to me.
Larry David
Do not degrade me in the military uniform I wear for it represents the love I have for my country, and the sacrifices myself and millions of other American soldiers make everyday to protect the freedom we enjoy by living in the United States of America.
Larry David
Zero, zero belief in myself. And it's changed somewhat, but there's still a lot of that in me.
Larry David
I think that for the most part, when I started doing comedy, it had become very commercialized.
Larry David
I like to be quiet, and let people find me rather than having to shout at them.
Larry David
Anyone can be confident with a full head of hair. But a confident bald man - there's your diamond in the rough.
Larry David
You know who wears sunglasses inside? Blind people and assholes.
Larry David
I still think of that guy I was without a wife or kids, and I still want to entertain that guy. The lonely guy, the frustrated guy, the guy with no money - this is the guy who needs to laugh.
Larry David
Well, after the divorce, I went home and turned all the lights on!
Larry David
It's always good to take something that's happened in your life and make something of it comedically.
Larry David
I have no sense of well-being. There's no chance the well will run dry.
Larry David
I don't like to be out of my comfort zone, which is about a half an inch wide.
Larry David
There's nothing that reflects me. I'm unreflectable!
Larry David
Obviously comedic styles do change.
Larry David
Hear the birds? Sometimes I like to pretend that I'm deaf and I try to imagine what it's like not to be able to hear them. It's not that bad.
Larry David
Trying on pants is one of the most humiliating things a man can suffer that doesn't involve a woman.
Larry David
I had a wonderful childhood, which is tough because it's hard to adjust to a miserable adulthood.
Larry David
