Quote

The addition of nuts in salad... I always find to be beneficial.

Larry David

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Larry David
Age: 77
Born: 1947
Born: July 2
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Director
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Sheepshead Bay
Brooklyn
Lawrence Gene David
Lawrence Gene Larry David
the greatest man alive
Addition
Beneficial
Nuts
Find
Always
Salad

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I still think of that guy I was without a wife or kids, and I still want to entertain that guy. The lonely guy, the frustrated guy, the guy with no money - this is the guy who needs to laugh.
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It's always good to take something that's happened in your life and make something of it comedically.
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I'm not a person who embraces challenges. I run from challenges. I break world records running from challenges.
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Sometimes you have to rely on sex and bodily functions.
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Hitler really ruined that mustache for everybody. It’s really an interesting mustache, but now, no one can wear it.
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I'd like to start a family, but you have to have a date first.
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Most practical jokes, I'll feel too bad for the other person so I'll stop just before the punchline.
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I was planning on my future as a homeless person. I had a really good spot picked out.
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You know who wears sunglasses inside? Blind people and assholes.
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The closest I ever came to death was masturbating with a 104-degree temperature.
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I don't like to be out of my comfort zone, which is about a half an inch wide.
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And eventually as I kept writing it, something emerged that was not quite me but a version of me.
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All of a sudden I discovered that I'm allergic to caviar. It was the perfect metaphor for my life. When I was only able to afford bad caviar, I could certainly eat my fill of it.
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Let's not forget, I got divorced.
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Switzerland is a place where they don't like to fight, so they get people to do their fighting for them while they ski and eat chocolate.
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I tolerate lactose like I tolerate people.
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Until I started doing standup, there were some very bleak days.
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Well, after the divorce, I went home and turned all the lights on!
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I think golf is literally an addiction. I'm surprised there's not Golf Anonymous.
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