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Sure, being a reservist wasn't as glamorous, but I was the one who had to look at myself in the mirror.
Larry David
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Larry David
Age: 77
Born: 1947
Born: July 2
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Director
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Sheepshead Bay
Brooklyn
Lawrence Gene David
Lawrence Gene Larry David
the greatest man alive
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More quotes by Larry David
I'd much rather be on stage talking to a couple of retards for twenty bucks than sitting at my desk thinking up jokes for...well let's say a few dollars more.
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You know who wears sunglasses inside? Blind people and assholes.
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Until I started doing standup, there were some very bleak days.
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When you're not concerned with succeeding, you can work with complete freedom.
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Give a guy a girlfriend and a great job, he doesn’t need therapy.
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It's that I wasn't suited to do the kind of comedy that these people were coming to hear - mainstream comedy.
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Perhaps I have a wider range than I'd given myself credit for.
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I had a job as a paralegal. I drove a cab.
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Zero, zero belief in myself. And it's changed somewhat, but there's still a lot of that in me.
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Hear the birds? Sometimes I like to pretend that I'm deaf and I try to imagine what it's like not to be able to hear them. It's not that bad.
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I still think of that guy I was without a wife or kids, and I still want to entertain that guy. The lonely guy, the frustrated guy, the guy with no money - this is the guy who needs to laugh.
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I'm surprized Hitler didn't round up the toupee people.
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I don't think anyone really is interested in reading about my emotional state. It's not even interesting to me.
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Anyone can be confident with a full head of hair. But a confident bald man - there's your diamond in the rough.
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I'm Larry David. I happen to enjoy wearing women's panties.
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I was planning on my future as a homeless person. I had a really good spot picked out.
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Making a woman laugh. What is that about? And the prettier the woman, the more satisfaction I get. It doesn't make any sense, but I'm being honest.
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The closest I ever came to death was masturbating with a 104-degree temperature.
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My life has changed. I'm not walking around any more wishing I wasn't me, which was the case at one time.
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I was very fortunate to hook up with Jerry in the first place. The network was already committed to doing something with him, so I skipped a couple of hundred steps right there.
Larry David
