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I had a job as a paralegal. I drove a cab.

Larry David

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Larry David
Age: 77
Born: 1947
Born: July 2
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Director
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Sheepshead Bay
Brooklyn
Lawrence Gene David
Lawrence Gene Larry David
the greatest man alive
Jobs
Cab
Taxi
Drove

More quotes by Larry David

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I'd much rather be on stage talking to a couple of retards for twenty bucks than sitting at my desk thinking up jokes for...well let's say a few dollars more.
Larry David
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I was planning on my future as a homeless person. I had a really good spot picked out.
Larry David
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And eventually as I kept writing it, something emerged that was not quite me but a version of me.
Larry David
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You know who wears sunglasses inside? Blind people and assholes.
Larry David
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Perhaps I have a wider range than I'd given myself credit for.
Larry David
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Hitler really ruined that mustache for everybody. It’s really an interesting mustache, but now, no one can wear it.
Larry David
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I'm surprized Hitler didn't round up the toupee people.
Larry David
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Give a guy a girlfriend and a great job, he doesn’t need therapy.
Larry David
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The closest I ever came to death was masturbating with a 104-degree temperature.
Larry David
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I'd like to start a family, but you have to have a date first.
Larry David
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I've been in therapy. I know enough about myself now to know that I really don't need to know anymore.
Larry David
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You can't do anything in life. The social barriers in life are so intense and horrific that every encounter is just fraught with so many problems and dread. Every social situation is a potential nightmare.
Larry David
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There's nothing that reflects me. I'm unreflectable!
Larry David
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I still think of that guy I was without a wife or kids, and I still want to entertain that guy. The lonely guy, the frustrated guy, the guy with no money - this is the guy who needs to laugh.
Larry David
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The addition of nuts in salad... I always find to be beneficial.
Larry David
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Zero, zero belief in myself. And it's changed somewhat, but there's still a lot of that in me.
Larry David
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A place to go - that's what my mother always instilled in me. You need a place to go. And you're worthless unless you have a place to go.
Larry David
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I was very fortunate to hook up with Jerry in the first place. The network was already committed to doing something with him, so I skipped a couple of hundred steps right there.
Larry David
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Luck always plays a part for everyone, whether they want to admit it or not. I was very lucky, and I know it.
Larry David
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If I tried to flirt with a woman and she didn't know who I was, she would run away.
Larry David