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I tolerate lactose like I tolerate people.
Larry David
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Larry David
Age: 77
Born: 1947
Born: July 2
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Director
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Sheepshead Bay
Brooklyn
Lawrence Gene David
Lawrence Gene Larry David
the greatest man alive
Lactose
Tolerate
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People
More quotes by Larry David
I just feed off the energy of the audience.
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I'm Larry David. I happen to enjoy wearing women's panties.
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In those days, reserve duty lasted for six years, which, I might add, was three times as long as service in the regular army, although to be perfectly honest, I was unable to fulfill my entire obligation because I was taking acting classes and they said I could skip my last year.
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Making a woman laugh. What is that about? And the prettier the woman, the more satisfaction I get. It doesn't make any sense, but I'm being honest.
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I'm a jerk, that's who I am. I'm like everybody else.
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Well, after the divorce, I went home and turned all the lights on!
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I don't like to analyze my music too much. It just comes welling up out of the depths of my soul.
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I'd like to start a family, but you have to have a date first.
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The closest I ever came to death was masturbating with a 104-degree temperature.
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I couldn't walk up to a woman at a bar and say hello.
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Let's not forget, I got divorced.
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I learned the first night that IHOP's not the place to order fish.
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I need to be on drugs to connect with nature.
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I don't like talking to people I KNOW, but strangers, I have no problem with.
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Pretty good. Pretttttttty, pretttttttttty, pretttttty good.
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Women love a self-confident bald man.
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I tell people that I've now done one decent thing in my life. Albeit inadvertently.
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I'm surprised sometimes at how some of my actions are misinterpreted.
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Zero, zero belief in myself. And it's changed somewhat, but there's still a lot of that in me.
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I had a wonderful childhood, which is tough because it's hard to adjust to a miserable adulthood.
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