Quote

The umpire had comical news. The congregation had been theoretically spotted from the air by a theoretical enemy. They were all theoretically dead now. The theoretical corpses laughed and ate a hearty noontime meal.

Kurt Vonnegut

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Kurt Vonnegut
Age: 84 †
Born: 1922
Born: November 11
Died: 2007
Died: April 14
Author
Essayist
Journalist
Novelist
Peace Activist
Philosopher
Playwright
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Indianapolis
Indiana
Kurt Vonnegut
Jr.
Enemy
Corpses
Theoretical
Umpire
Meal
Spotted
Meals
Theoretically
Laughed
Comical
Air
Hearty
News
Congregation
Dead
Umpires

More quotes by Kurt Vonnegut

Image
There is nothing left of him but curiosity and a pair of eyes.
Kurt Vonnegut
Image
Do you think Arabs are dumb? They gave us our numbers. Try doing long division with Roman numerals.
Kurt Vonnegut
Image
The practice of art isn't to make a living. It's to make your soul grow.
Kurt Vonnegut
Image
I think William Shakespeare was the wisest human being I ever heard of. To be perfectly frank, though, that's not saying much.
Kurt Vonnegut
Image
Socialism is, in fact, a form of Christianity, people wishing to imitate Christ.
Kurt Vonnegut
Image
I wasn't aware of Ku Klux Klan as I was aware of the widespread assumption that African-Americans were dumber than white people. I think my father believed that. I think everybody white did.
Kurt Vonnegut
Image
We have such a young culture that there is an opportunity to contribute wonderful new myths to it, which will be accepted.
Kurt Vonnegut
Image
I was hoping to build a country and add to its literature. That's why I served in World War II, and that's why I wrote books.
Kurt Vonnegut
Image
Vietnam was a country where America was trying to make people stop being communists by dropping things on them from airplanes.
Kurt Vonnegut
Image
And what is literature, Rabo, he said, but an insider's newsletter about affairs relating to molecules, of no importance to anything in the universe but a few molecules who have the disease called 'thought'.
Kurt Vonnegut
Image
. . . but the Universe is an awfully big place. There is room enough for an awful lot of people to be right about things and still not agree.
Kurt Vonnegut
Image
The paintings by dead men who were poor most of their lives are the most valuable pieces in my collection. And if an artist wants to really jack up the prices of his creations, may I suggest this: suicide.
Kurt Vonnegut
Image
One [television] program was an interminable exploration of the question: can a woman with a low I.Q. be happily married to a man with a high one? The answer seemed to be yes and no.
Kurt Vonnegut
Image
A lot of people were opposed to it. A lot of people were for it. I myself think about it as little as possible.
Kurt Vonnegut
Image
Jokes can be noble. Laughs are exactly as honorable as tears. Laughter and tears are both responses to frustration and exhaustion, to the futility of thinking and striving anymore. I myself prefer to laugh, since there is less cleaning up to do afterward - and since I can start thinking and striving again that much sooner.
Kurt Vonnegut
Image
The nicest veterans in Schenectady, I thought, the kindest and funniest ones, the ones who hated war the most, were the ones who'd really fought.
Kurt Vonnegut
Image
The universe is a big place, perhaps the biggest.
Kurt Vonnegut
Image
Pretend to be good always and even God will be fooled.
Kurt Vonnegut
Image
If somebody says, I love you, to me, I feel as though I had a pistol pointed at my head. What can anybody reply under such conditions but that which the pistol-holder requires? I love you, too.
Kurt Vonnegut
Image
Puny man can do nothing at all to help or please God Almighty, and Luck is not the hand of God.
Kurt Vonnegut