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What the Gospels actually said was: don't kill anyone until you are absolutely sure they aren't well connected.

Kurt Vonnegut

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Kurt Vonnegut
Age: 84 †
Born: 1922
Born: November 11
Died: 2007
Died: April 14
Author
Essayist
Journalist
Novelist
Peace Activist
Philosopher
Playwright
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Indianapolis
Indiana
Kurt Vonnegut
Jr.
Aren
Anyone
Sure
Actually
Religion
Gospels
Wells
Connected
Well
Absolutely
Kill

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1. Find a subject you care about. 2. Do not ramble, though. 3. Keep it simple. 4. Have the guts to cut. 5. Sound like yourself. 6. Say what you mean to say. 7. Pity the readers.
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My ancestors came over from Germany about the time of the Civil War and one of them lost a leg and went back to Germany.
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I think jokes are a perfectly viable form of literature. Some critics take issue with me because I make my points and discuss my ideas with jokes, rather than with oceanic tragedy.
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Nowadays, of course, just about our only solvent industry is the merchandising of death, bankrolled by our grandchildren.
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Laughter or crying is what a human being does when there's nothing else he can do.
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After that demonstration everybody was thinking, what's going to happen to these wonderful men who have been so useful to us? We have to give people something to do with life.
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Mark Twain was so good with crowds that he became, in competition with singers and dancers and actors and acrobats, one of the most popular performers of his time. It is so unusual, and so psychologically unlikely, too, for a great writer to be a great performer, too.
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People are lying all the time as to what a murderous nation we are. So let it be known. We're behaving abominably. It's like having a relative go absolutely nuts. Somebody has to say, I think Uncle Charlie's off his rocker. We are behaving in a bizarre manner.
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I don't think there would be many jokes, if there weren't constant frustration and fear and so forth. It's a response to bad troubles like crime.
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Love is where you find it.
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Practice any art, music, singing, dancing, acting, drawing, painting, sculpting, poetry, fiction, essays, reportage, no matter how well or badly, not to get money and fame, but to experience becoming, to find out what's inside you, to make your soul grow.
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Be fruitful, and multiply.
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The most damning revelation you can make about yourself is that you do not know what is interesting and what is not.
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... humanity deserved to die horribly, since it had behaved so cruelly and wastefully on a planet so sweet.
Kurt Vonnegut
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How complicated and unpredictable the machinery of life really is.
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He was a graduate of West Point, which is military academy that turns young men into homicidal maniacs for use in war.
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The reason we write fiction is because it's so much easier to exist spending part of each day in an imaginary world.
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Every sentence must do one of two things-reveal character or advance the action.
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Be patient. Your future will come to you and lie down at your feet like a dog who knows and loves you no matter what you are.
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How nice -- to feel nothing, and still get full credit for being alive.
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