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I pity the Jews trying to get through life with only half a Bible. That's like trying to get from here to San Francisco with a road map that stops at Dubuque, Iowa.

Kurt Vonnegut

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Kurt Vonnegut
Age: 84 †
Born: 1922
Born: November 11
Died: 2007
Died: April 14
Author
Essayist
Journalist
Novelist
Peace Activist
Philosopher
Playwright
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Indianapolis
Indiana
Kurt Vonnegut
Jr.
Half
Stops
Trying
Maps
Life
Jews
Like
Jew
Pity
Bible
Road
Iowa
Religious
Francisco

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The planet was being destroyed by manufacturing processes, and what was being manufactured was lousy, by and large.
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We are here on Earth to fart around. Don't let anybody tell you any different.
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Do you think Arabs are dumb? They gave us our numbers. Try doing long division with Roman numerals.
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Maturity is a bitter disappointment for which no remedy exists, unless laughter could be said to remedy anything.
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That’s the attractive thing about war,” said Rosewater. “Absolutely everybody gets a little something.
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Since Alice had never received any religious instruction, and since she had led a blameless life, she never thought of her awful luck as being anything but accidents in a very busy place. Good for her.
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Never trust a survivor until you know how they survived.
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Trout was petrified there on Forty-second Street. It had given him a life not worth living, but I had also given him an iron will to live. This was a common combination on the planet Earth.
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I saw the destruction of Dresden. I saw the city before and then came out of an air-raid shelter and saw it afterward, and certainly one response was laughter. God knows, that's the soul seeking some relief.
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Unfortunately, that still leaves plenty of Americans who don't read much or think much -- who will still be extremely useful in unjust wars. We are sick about that. We did the best we could.
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Oh, a lion hunter in the jungle dark, And a sleeping drunkard up in central park, and a Chinese dentist and a British queen All fit together in the same machine. Nice, nice, such very different people in the same device!
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They do not love one another because they do not love themselves.
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Just in the nick of time they realized that it was their own habitat they were wrecking -- that they weren't merely visitors.
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People need good lies. There are too many bad ones.
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How complicated and unpredictable the machinery of life really is.
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If you actually are an educated, thinking person, you will not be welcome in Washington, D.C. I know a couple of bright seventh graders who would not be welcome in Washington D.C.
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So, in the interests of survival, they trained themselves to be agreeing machines instead of thinking machines. All their minds had to do was to discover what other people were thinking, and then they thought that, too.
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It goes against the American storytelling grain to have someone in a situation he can't get out of, but I think this is very usual in life.
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