Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
Mel: Does Bret's girlfriend look anything like me? Murray: A little, around the eyes. Mel: Oh yeah? Big eyes huh? Murray: Well... she's got eyes.
Kristen Schaal
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
Kristen Schaal
Age: 46
Born: 1978
Born: January 24
Actress
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Longmont
Colorado
Kristen Joy Schaal
Wells
Funny
Bret
Well
Bigs
Looks
Around
Murray
Like
Doe
Girlfriend
Littles
Yeah
Anything
Humor
Look
Eyes
Little
Eye
More quotes by Kristen Schaal
I think I've always had a disconnect from what I'm supposed to be like.
Kristen Schaal
I mean if you two were to make love, that would be gay. Two men touching each other physically and emotionally...erotically caressing each other...on the hood of a car...or the back of a movie theater.
Kristen Schaal
Some women were talking about how I put out. And that's just not that case. I don't put out - unless I'm asked very, very politely, and that's not putting out, that's just giving in.
Kristen Schaal
I'm just happy our nations are on the same page of keeping shitty reality TV on the air. Small world!
Kristen Schaal
I used to carry a rabbit's foot for luck. Then it was a monkey's paw. Now it's a camel's toe.
Kristen Schaal
I would imagine that Bret would taste like a warm goat cheese, and Jemaine would taste like harvati with dill. Hmm...I'm hungry actually.
Kristen Schaal
As you can see, I speak many languages, including the language of sex.
Kristen Schaal
I'm so happy to be around people. I just really like people, and being a freelancer can be lonely during the day, when you're at home trying to write anything you can.
Kristen Schaal
Fingernails are for opening things and toenails are for storing precious minerals off the ground.
Kristen Schaal
One good thing about being locked in a cage: No responsibility!
Kristen Schaal
He resisted for a while and there were some legal boundaries, you know, keeping me from being near him or his family, but in the end, love overcame. And I got what I wanted. I always get what I want.
Kristen Schaal
If you were to send a werewolf to the moon, would he be a werewolf permanently?
Kristen Schaal
The service at this airport restaurant is so bad I'm starting to panic that I'm a ghost.
Kristen Schaal
You're looking good today Bret. Very hot... hotter than Jemaine. You have a refined bone structure, while Jemaine's facial features are too deep set to be classically handsome.
Kristen Schaal
I would like to be known as someone who was really sweet but also knowledgeable in all areas of life.
Kristen Schaal
The torture that they are coming up with in China is so creative. They have this other method where they'll take a bamboo and they'll plant it in your anus and just let it grow. So patient. Man, watch out for China, I say. They have all the ambition as we do but none of the heart.
Kristen Schaal
All the best movies are the ones that are cut from a more middle ground.
Kristen Schaal
Everybody's trying to leave their mark on the world. That's why there's graffiti and babies.
Kristen Schaal
Still blows my mind that toilet paper isn't free.
Kristen Schaal
I diagnosed my loneliness as premature empty nest syndrome.
Kristen Schaal
