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I want to be governor [of Texas] because I need the closet space.

Kinky Friedman

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Kinky Friedman
Age: 80
Born: 1944
Born: November 1
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Musician
Novelist
Politician
Singer
Singer-Songwriter
Songwriter
Writer
Chicago
Illinois
Texas
Space
Need
Needs
Closet
Governor
Closets
Governors

More quotes by Kinky Friedman

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I've been in true love many times. I just try to avoid it as much as possible. For if there's one thing I know about true love, it is that sooner or later, it results in a hostage situation.
Kinky Friedman
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I don't apologize to people who try to intimidate.
Kinky Friedman
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We're all worm bait waiting to happen. It's what you do while you wait that matters.
Kinky Friedman
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The reason educational spending in Texas is so low is because you don't have a state tax there, and that's why Texas is big growth because you don't tax people to death.
Kinky Friedman
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In six days the Lord created the heavens and the earth and all the wonders therein. There are some of us who feel that He might have taken just a little more time.
Kinky Friedman
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What has six balls and screws Texans? The Texas Lottery.
Kinky Friedman
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You have to work at it if you want to be a good smoker. Especially today with all the non-smoking world constantly harassing you.
Kinky Friedman
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If you elect me the first Jewish justice of the peace, I'll reduce the speed limits to 54.95!
Kinky Friedman
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The first thing I'll do if elected is demand a recount.
Kinky Friedman
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The teachers are getting screwed, blued, and tattooed by the system.
Kinky Friedman
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They probably would've taken Jesus if he hadn't been nailed down.
Kinky Friedman
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We've got to clear some of the room out of the prisons so we can put the bad guys in there, like the pedophiles and the politicians.
Kinky Friedman
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Jerry Jones and Chris Christie are probably the most important latent homosexual relationship since Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson.
Kinky Friedman
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No matter where you go, you always see yourself in the rearview mirror.
Kinky Friedman
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You have to pretend that your life is a financial pleasure even when your autographs are bouncing.
Kinky Friedman
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I support gay marriage. I believe they have a right to be as miserable as the rest of us.
Kinky Friedman
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I see an issue I like, and I support it.
Kinky Friedman
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I'd felt that a man without a woman was like a neck without a pain.
Kinky Friedman
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When a stray animal crosses your path, it may be as close to God as you're going to get in this lifetime.
Kinky Friedman
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Finding a cat--or having a cat find you--can change your world as much as marriage, divorce, love, death, or even winning the lottery can, and sometimes more.
Kinky Friedman