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I'm ready for anything. That's probably why it never happens.

Kinky Friedman

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Kinky Friedman
Age: 80
Born: 1944
Born: November 1
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Musician
Novelist
Politician
Singer
Singer-Songwriter
Songwriter
Writer
Chicago
Illinois
Ready
Probably
Happens
Anything
Never

More quotes by Kinky Friedman

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If you elect me the first Jewish justice of the peace, I'll reduce the speed limits to 54.95!
Kinky Friedman
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The system is not perfect. Until it's perfect, let's do away with the death penalty.
Kinky Friedman
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My plan is to bring back like the Bracero Program from 1944 that ran for 20 years where the Mexican government vets these people. I mean, they pay for it, and they get green cards, and they're actually legitimate. And then seal the border.
Kinky Friedman
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Finding a cat--or having a cat find you--can change your world as much as marriage, divorce, love, death, or even winning the lottery can, and sometimes more.
Kinky Friedman
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If you don't love Jesus-go to hell!
Kinky Friedman
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If Jesus Christ had run as an independent, Rick Perry would have beat him.
Kinky Friedman
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When you record something, you never know who's going to hear it.
Kinky Friedman
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Remember: Y'all is singular. All y'all is plural. All y'all's is plural possessive.
Kinky Friedman
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I've achieved many of my dreams, and I want to see that some others get a chance to, especially younger Texans.
Kinky Friedman
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Simón Bolívar is the only person in history to be exiled from a country named after him.
Kinky Friedman
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I'll sign anything except bad legislation.
Kinky Friedman
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I rarely meddled in the cat's personal affairs and she rarely meddled in mine. Neither of us was foolish enough to attribute human emotions to our pets.
Kinky Friedman
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I'd felt that a man without a woman was like a neck without a pain.
Kinky Friedman
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If you're paranoid long enough, sooner or later you're gonna be right.
Kinky Friedman
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Young people are the key to this election.
Kinky Friedman
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I don't see how the people who created the problem can fix it. Texas is worth fighting for, and the best way to fight is to get the politicians out of politics.
Kinky Friedman
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They probably would've taken Jesus if he hadn't been nailed down.
Kinky Friedman
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You never marry the person you first see 'Casablanca' with.
Kinky Friedman
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When a stray animal crosses your path, it may be as close to God as you're going to get in this lifetime.
Kinky Friedman
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Jerry Jones and Chris Christie are probably the most important latent homosexual relationship since Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson.
Kinky Friedman