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I just want Texas to be number one in something other than executions, toll roads and property taxes.
Kinky Friedman
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Kinky Friedman
Age: 80
Born: 1944
Born: November 1
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Musician
Novelist
Politician
Singer
Singer-Songwriter
Songwriter
Writer
Chicago
Illinois
Number
Executions
Numbers
Toll
Something
Tolls
Roads
Execution
Texas
Property
Taxes
More quotes by Kinky Friedman
I'm well aware that the Nelson Mandelas and the Winston Churchills of the world happened by accident. They usually come out of nowhere.
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I rarely meddled in the cat's personal affairs and she rarely meddled in mine. Neither of us was foolish enough to attribute human emotions to our pets.
Kinky Friedman
If you're paranoid long enough, sooner or later you're gonna be right.
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I'm ready for anything. That's probably why it never happens.
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These days, there are many people around the world who listen to the songs that made me infamous and read the books that made me respectable.
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I'm too young for Medicare and too old for women to care.
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I've achieved many of my dreams, and I want to see that some others get a chance to, especially younger Texans.
Kinky Friedman
Yes, I'm a Judeo-Christian. Jesus and Moses are in my heart. And both of them were independents, by the way.
Kinky Friedman
What has six balls and screws Texans? The Texas Lottery.
Kinky Friedman
I want to be governor [of Texas] because I need the closet space.
Kinky Friedman
You have to pretend that your life is a financial pleasure even when your autographs are bouncing.
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When you record something, you never know who's going to hear it.
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Jerry Jones and Chris Christie are probably the most important latent homosexual relationship since Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson.
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The people I respect all died broke and despairing. They didn't leave a lot of hammered iron behind them like Donald Trump has done.
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I suffer from the curse of being multi-talented. There's no doubt about it. Politics and literature have gotten in the way of songwriting.
Kinky Friedman
Golf is the only opportunity that middle-aged WASPs have to dress up like a pimp.
Kinky Friedman
The first thing I'll do if elected is demand a recount.
Kinky Friedman
A happy childhood is the worst possible preparation for life.
Kinky Friedman
If you elect me the first Jewish justice of the peace, I'll reduce the speed limits to 54.95!
Kinky Friedman
The system is not perfect. Until it's perfect, let's do away with the death penalty.
Kinky Friedman
