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There are two ways to handle a woman, and nobody knows either of them.

Kin Hubbard

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Kin Hubbard
Age: 62 †
Born: 1868
Born: September 1
Died: 1930
Died: December 26
Cartoonist
Humorist
Journalist
Bellefontaine
Ohio
Frank McKinney Hubbard
Two
Way
Handle
Nobody
Ways
Either
Literature
Woman

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Washing your car and polishing it all up is a never failing sign of rain.
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Executive: a man who makes quick decisions and is sometimes right.
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Next to a circus there ain't nothing that packs up and tears out faster than the Christmas spirit.
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Another bad thing about prosperity is that you can't jingle any money without being under suspicion
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Kindness goes a long ways lots of times when it ought to stay at home.
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Gittin' talked about is one o' th' penalties for bein' purty.
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Universal peace sounds ridiculous to the head of an average family.
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All the world loves a good loser.
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A loafer always has the correct time.
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The fellow that calls you 'brother' usually wants something that doesn't belong to him.
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As to those who hoard gold and silver and spend it not in God's path, give them, then, the tidings of a painful agony: on a day when these things shall be heated in hell-fire, and their foreheads, and their sides, and their backs shall be branded therewith.
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The man who says I may be wrong, but-- does not believe there can be any such possibility.
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I will say this for adversity: people seem to be able to stand it, and that is more than I can say for prosperity.
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About the only thing we have left that actually discriminates in favor of the plain people is the stork.
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No one can feel as helpless as the owner of a sick goldfish.
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Some folks seem to have descended from the chimpanzee much later than others.
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The reason the way of the transgressor is hard is because it's so crowded.
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A sadder but wiser man is a thousand times more agreeable to meet than the feller that never makes a mistake.
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The only way to entertain some folks is to listen to them.
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If at first you do succeed don't take any more chances.
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