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Don't play dead with a vulture. That's exactly what they want.

Kevin Nealon

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Kevin Nealon
Age: 71
Born: 1953
Born: November 18
Actor
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Bridgeport
Connecticut
Vulture
Exactly
Dead
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More quotes by Kevin Nealon

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As a comedian, you're kind of like a blues musician you have to live a little bit.
Kevin Nealon
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I am whelmed, and not overly whelmed, just whelmed about a lot of facets in life - just how fragile life is and the different challenges you have in life, phobias about things.
Kevin Nealon
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It's tough getting older. You start falling apart, you know? My gums are starting to recede now. You can't tell tonight, though, 'cause I comb them forward.
Kevin Nealon
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A lot of baby boomers are baby bongers.
Kevin Nealon
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I grew up watching stand-ups and thought it was so entertaining and unique - you didn’t see that as a job description anywhere.
Kevin Nealon
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I loved working on 'Happy Gilmore' because I love to travel to new places and we got to go to British Columbia. Any Adam Sandler film is fun to work on because it is a reunion of the boys club of guys that have worked together in the past.
Kevin Nealon
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I remember the first date I ever went out on. It was in high school. Her name was Marguerite. She was kind of a heavyset girl... I took her out on one date. We went out for dinner and a movie and a dinner.
Kevin Nealon
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I became a vegetarian after I became aware of factory farming and slaughterhouses and the torture and inhumane handling of all these animals.
Kevin Nealon
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Saturday Night Live was a show that I never thought I would be on, because I didn't do sketch comedy and I didn't do impressions. I was a stand-up.
Kevin Nealon
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Curb Your Enthusiasm, is not so much about Hollywood. It's more about Larry's weaknesses.
Kevin Nealon
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'The Outer Limits' was one of those shows I grew up watching - that and The 'Twilight Zone.'
Kevin Nealon
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I really like to read when I'm eating - 'The New York Times' or the 'Wall Street Journal,' paper version.
Kevin Nealon
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A special validates you as a stand-up by documenting your material.
Kevin Nealon
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What happened was, I always wanted to be a singer/songwriter kind of guy like a James Taylor or Crosby, Stills and Nash type of thing I went to a lot of coffee houses and used to watch all those guys, but I never had the nerve to get up and do it because singing seems so personal and intimate to me. It was too revealing.
Kevin Nealon
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I enjoyed living in New York City, I liked the premise of the show [Saturday Night Live], I liked working with a different host every week and different musicians. I always thought, This is great. I never expected to get this in the first place, so I'm just happy being here.
Kevin Nealon
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When I first began doing TV pilots, my expectations were high. I didn't understand that world. So when 'Weeds' took off, I was so happy. Especially as I was just a guest star in the pilot. But once it got picked up, they made me a regular cast member.
Kevin Nealon
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I play a lot of sports. I'm not real good at any of them. I'm above adequate.
Kevin Nealon
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I think I sent out some résumés for marketing jobs, and they all came back in the mail because I didn't have enough postage.
Kevin Nealon
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I never really got into marketing. I went to school for it, but never pursued it once I got out. Instead, I went to Europe for about two months, just traveling around in youth hostels and Eurail trains with my friends.
Kevin Nealon
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A novel is too much of a commitment. I tend to peruse Twitter - I check to see if I had any mentions and read the latest messages.
Kevin Nealon