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Granuaile:So why don't cult leaders achieve godhood? Atticus: Because they're megalomaniacs drenched in douche juice.

Kevin Hearne

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Kevin Hearne
Age: 53
Born: 1970
Born: December 9
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
AZ
Juice
Cult
Leaders
Godhood
Achieve
Douche
Leader
Douches
Megalomaniacs
Atticus
Drenched

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Atticus What's this religion going to be called? Oberon Poochism A:and the name of this holy writ I will be typing for you? O:The dead flea scrolls: A Sirius Prophecy.
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She switched from ecstasy to embarrassment at about Mach five.
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She thinks petting me is an honor. This is an unexpected position to take for a goddess of slaughter, but I applaud her defiance of convention.
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They'll have to bring in Mulder an' Scully, because there ain't no CSI on the planet that'll ever be able to explain this.
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That’s what a skinwalker is: a mean asshole with a meaner spirit squatting inside.” I’ve run into some of those at the dog park, Oberon said. They’re usually attached to Chihuahuas.
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Yer a good lad, Atticus, mowin’ me lawn and killin’ what Brits come around.
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I hoped you would consider it seriously instead of laughing at it.' 'Mr. Chamkanni said much the same thing in bed the first night home from the hospital
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Gods can screw anything and anybody. For reference, see history. Atticus O'Sullivan
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What do you know? She liked to be told she was scary. Kinky.
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Let me tell you, people go on and on about what a great idea electricity was, but I'm going to put toilet paper right next to the wheel and say those are the best ideas anyone's ever had. Scoff at it if you will, but try living for two millennia without it and then we'll talk.
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The Morrigan’s ideas of sport and mine varied widely. As a Chooser of the Slain, she tends to enjoy nothing so much as a protracted war. She hangs out with Kali and the Valkyries and they have a death goddesses’ night out on the battlefield.
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I would never behave with so little dignity. Nor would I wish to be confronted in such a manner by anyone else. Vampires inspire screams, not squees. Involuntary urination is common, I grant, but it properly flows from a sense of terror, not an ecstatic sense of hero worship.
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Depression is a prison to which you have the key except you never think to look for it.
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Peace be with you, I said, and as I turned to resume my journey with Coyote, I added under my breath, and asskicking be with me.
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You don't need to say any special incantation or sacrifice a stray cat or something first?
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Wooo!’ he said, slamming his shot glass down and coughing a bit. ‘That’s good stuff.’ I agreed heartily. ‘Shall we do another one?’ I asked. ‘Oh no,’ Jesus said quietly, his eyes growing round. ‘This is one of those situations where I have to stop and ask myself, what would I do?
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Am I not a fearsome enemy? You frighten me primally.
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Poison? she (Granuaile)said,I hope it isn't iocane powder.
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You will respect my authori-tah!' Oberon said, in a passable imitation of Eric Cartman. I reminded him that I needed to concentrate. Sometimes dogs forget they just get too excited.
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Whoa. He had ghouls on speed dial. My lawyer kicks so much ass.
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