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But now that she was my apprentice, every such thought caused a guilty twitch in my neck, as if someone had dropped a sleek, stinky ferret there. Guilt ferrets are bastards.
Kevin Hearne
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Kevin Hearne
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: December 9
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
AZ
Guilty
Ferrets
Guilt
Stinky
Someone
Bastards
Thought
Apprentice
Every
Dropped
Neck
Ferret
Necks
Twitch
Caused
Sleek
More quotes by Kevin Hearne
Flidais clapped her hands in delight. Oh, I bet he nearly shat kine! That made me laugh - I hadn't heard that expression in a long, long time. I refrained from telling her that the modern expression would be he had a cow, because I liked the original better. Yes, the kine he nearly shat would have fed several clans.
Kevin Hearne
I would never behave with so little dignity. Nor would I wish to be confronted in such a manner by anyone else. Vampires inspire screams, not squees. Involuntary urination is common, I grant, but it properly flows from a sense of terror, not an ecstatic sense of hero worship.
Kevin Hearne
She switched from ecstasy to embarrassment at about Mach five.
Kevin Hearne
When he said to give him the sword, I don’t think he meant for you to stick it in his guts.
Kevin Hearne
Am I not a fearsome enemy? You frighten me primally.
Kevin Hearne
On a Creep Scale from Hello Kitty to Cthulhu, I award it a Freddy Krueger. Granuaile MacTiernan
Kevin Hearne
That’s what a skinwalker is: a mean asshole with a meaner spirit squatting inside.” I’ve run into some of those at the dog park, Oberon said. They’re usually attached to Chihuahuas.
Kevin Hearne
...Having no recourse, I feel back on Shakespeare. Leif would recognize it and understand the context properly. With my remaining few seconds of consciousness, I quoted Benedick from Much Ado About Nothing, who spoke these words to his former friend: you are a Villain: I jest not. and then I collapsed into a pool of my own blood.
Kevin Hearne
I had privately changed 'This, too, shall pass' into 'You, too, shall die'.
Kevin Hearne
Brighid’s eyes flashed with a blue flame, and I wondered if she had learned to do that just so she could compete with the Morrigan’s red flashes. Maybe I should try to figure out how to make my eyes flash green so I could freak out the baristas at Starbucks. “No, you foolish mortal,” I’d say as my eyes glowed, “I ordered a nonfat latte.
Kevin Hearne
The royal hound's belly demands rubbing. Step lively, humans, neglect me not. ~Oberon
Kevin Hearne
Poison? she (Granuaile)said,I hope it isn't iocane powder.
Kevin Hearne
There is always a price to pay for badassery. Neo was a badass in the Matrix and the Matrix Reloaded, but the price he had to pay was The Matrix Revolutions.
Kevin Hearne
Winning ugly is still winning.
Kevin Hearne
Wooo!’ he said, slamming his shot glass down and coughing a bit. ‘That’s good stuff.’ I agreed heartily. ‘Shall we do another one?’ I asked. ‘Oh no,’ Jesus said quietly, his eyes growing round. ‘This is one of those situations where I have to stop and ask myself, what would I do?
Kevin Hearne
Gods can screw anything and anybody. For reference, see history. Atticus O'Sullivan
Kevin Hearne
Oh. Oberon looked at me. I know that has to make you sad. But call to me instead, Atticus. I'll always answer. Your fly has been open all this time, by the way, and Granuaile hasn't said a thing. Thanks, buddy, I said silently as I tried to surreptitiously zip up my jeans. See? I got your back AND your front. I deserve a treat.
Kevin Hearne
She's kind of like a Mary Poppins just before she turns to the dark side of the Force, Oberon said. He was still behind the counter, but he had a good lok at her as she exited. Let go of your anger, Malina! There's still good in you! The Emperor hasn't driven it from you fully!
Kevin Hearne
She thinks petting me is an honor. This is an unexpected position to take for a goddess of slaughter, but I applaud her defiance of convention.
Kevin Hearne
... we banked around until we found a rainbow in the dark. It was on this occasion that I discovered that Granuaile had never heard of Ronnie James Dio. My shock at this news was such that I almost completely missed the fact that we were traveling on Bifrost, the rainbow bridge to Asgard.
Kevin Hearne