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On a Creep Scale from Hello Kitty to Cthulhu, I award it a Freddy Krueger. Granuaile MacTiernan

Kevin Hearne

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Kevin Hearne
Age: 53
Born: 1970
Born: December 9
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
AZ
Award
Creeps
Hello
Awards
Scale
Freddy
Scales
Kitty
Kitties
Creep

More quotes by Kevin Hearne

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I would never behave with so little dignity. Nor would I wish to be confronted in such a manner by anyone else. Vampires inspire screams, not squees. Involuntary urination is common, I grant, but it properly flows from a sense of terror, not an ecstatic sense of hero worship.
Kevin Hearne
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Gods can screw anything and anybody. For reference, see history. Atticus O'Sullivan
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You don't need to say any special incantation or sacrifice a stray cat or something first?
Kevin Hearne
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Monty Python is like catnip for nerds. Once you get them started quoting it, they are constitutionally incapable of feeling depressed.
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I yawned and stretched luxuriously in the morning. I make noises when I stretch because it feels ten times better than stretching silently.
Kevin Hearne
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There is always a price to pay for badassery. Neo was a badass in the Matrix and the Matrix Reloaded, but the price he had to pay was The Matrix Revolutions.
Kevin Hearne
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...Having no recourse, I feel back on Shakespeare. Leif would recognize it and understand the context properly. With my remaining few seconds of consciousness, I quoted Benedick from Much Ado About Nothing, who spoke these words to his former friend: you are a Villain: I jest not. and then I collapsed into a pool of my own blood.
Kevin Hearne
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Poison? she (Granuaile)said,I hope it isn't iocane powder.
Kevin Hearne
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That’s what a skinwalker is: a mean asshole with a meaner spirit squatting inside.” I’ve run into some of those at the dog park, Oberon said. They’re usually attached to Chihuahuas.
Kevin Hearne
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She's kind of like a Mary Poppins just before she turns to the dark side of the Force, Oberon said. He was still behind the counter, but he had a good lok at her as she exited. Let go of your anger, Malina! There's still good in you! The Emperor hasn't driven it from you fully!
Kevin Hearne
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If I waved that in front of a museum curator, he'd promptly lose control of his salivary glands.
Kevin Hearne
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... we banked around until we found a rainbow in the dark. It was on this occasion that I discovered that Granuaile had never heard of Ronnie James Dio. My shock at this news was such that I almost completely missed the fact that we were traveling on Bifrost, the rainbow bridge to Asgard.
Kevin Hearne
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You will respect my authori-tah!' Oberon said, in a passable imitation of Eric Cartman. I reminded him that I needed to concentrate. Sometimes dogs forget they just get too excited.
Kevin Hearne
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He was a god of rock. He nearly solved all the world's problems with nothing but power chords and anguished cries into a microphone.
Kevin Hearne
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I hoped you would consider it seriously instead of laughing at it.' 'Mr. Chamkanni said much the same thing in bed the first night home from the hospital
Kevin Hearne
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Turns out that once you kill a god, people want to talk to you. Paranormal insurance salesmen with special godslayer term life policies. Charlatan's with godproof armor and extraplanar safe houses for rent. But most notably, other gods.
Kevin Hearne
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The point is, Mrs. MacDonagh, that the universe is exactly the size that your soul can encompass. Some people live in extremely small worlds, and some live in a world of infinite possibility.
Kevin Hearne
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Peace be with you, I said, and as I turned to resume my journey with Coyote, I added under my breath, and asskicking be with me.
Kevin Hearne
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She switched from ecstasy to embarrassment at about Mach five.
Kevin Hearne
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The royal hound's belly demands rubbing. Step lively, humans, neglect me not. ~Oberon
Kevin Hearne