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Wisdom eludes me yet, but foolishness I captured long ago and to this day it is my constant companion, though many people consider me wise.
Kevin Hearne
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Kevin Hearne
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: December 9
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
AZ
People
Companion
Consider
Constant
Wise
Wisdom
Eludes
Though
Elude
Many
Foolishness
Long
Captured
More quotes by Kevin Hearne
Am I not a fearsome enemy? You frighten me primally.
Kevin Hearne
They'll have to bring in Mulder an' Scully, because there ain't no CSI on the planet that'll ever be able to explain this.
Kevin Hearne
Atticus What's this religion going to be called? Oberon Poochism A:and the name of this holy writ I will be typing for you? O:The dead flea scrolls: A Sirius Prophecy.
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Oh. Oberon looked at me. I know that has to make you sad. But call to me instead, Atticus. I'll always answer. Your fly has been open all this time, by the way, and Granuaile hasn't said a thing. Thanks, buddy, I said silently as I tried to surreptitiously zip up my jeans. See? I got your back AND your front. I deserve a treat.
Kevin Hearne
Let me tell you, people go on and on about what a great idea electricity was, but I'm going to put toilet paper right next to the wheel and say those are the best ideas anyone's ever had. Scoff at it if you will, but try living for two millennia without it and then we'll talk.
Kevin Hearne
Winning ugly is still winning.
Kevin Hearne
When he said to give him the sword, I don’t think he meant for you to stick it in his guts.
Kevin Hearne
She's kind of like a Mary Poppins just before she turns to the dark side of the Force, Oberon said. He was still behind the counter, but he had a good lok at her as she exited. Let go of your anger, Malina! There's still good in you! The Emperor hasn't driven it from you fully!
Kevin Hearne
Yes and I appreciate it. But this is going to be difficult enough without running my words through a filter of illiteracy.
Kevin Hearne
Oh, I know. They’re dwarfs pretending to be elves. No, they’re not dwarfs either. Okay, okay, they’re “little people,” I’m sorry! Can’t believe I have to be politically correct when you’re the only one who can hear me.
Kevin Hearne
The Morrigan’s ideas of sport and mine varied widely. As a Chooser of the Slain, she tends to enjoy nothing so much as a protracted war. She hangs out with Kali and the Valkyries and they have a death goddesses’ night out on the battlefield.
Kevin Hearne
She thinks petting me is an honor. This is an unexpected position to take for a goddess of slaughter, but I applaud her defiance of convention.
Kevin Hearne
The point is, Mrs. MacDonagh, that the universe is exactly the size that your soul can encompass. Some people live in extremely small worlds, and some live in a world of infinite possibility.
Kevin Hearne
If I waved that in front of a museum curator, he'd promptly lose control of his salivary glands.
Kevin Hearne
She switched from ecstasy to embarrassment at about Mach five.
Kevin Hearne
Do Angels have assholes? Atticus O'Sullivan - Hexed
Kevin Hearne
He will spit you and roast you with rosemary, and we will all sample your flesh tonight. Tomorrow you will be shat out into the snow. Your diplomacy is bold and edgy, sir.
Kevin Hearne
As any war veteran will tell you, there is a vast difference between preparing for battle and actually facing battle for the first time.
Kevin Hearne
But now that she was my apprentice, every such thought caused a guilty twitch in my neck, as if someone had dropped a sleek, stinky ferret there. Guilt ferrets are bastards.
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Before he (Francis Bacon) came along, people conducted all their arguments through a series of logical fallacies or simply shouting louder than the other guy, or, if they did use facts, they only selected ones that reinforced their prejudices and advanced their ideas.” Oberon replies “don’t they still do that?
Kevin Hearne