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Kids? It's like living with homeless people. They're cute but they just chase you around all day long going, 'Can I have a dollar? I'm missing a shoe! I need a ride!
Kathleen Madigan
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Kathleen Madigan
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: September 30
Comedian
Screenwriter
Florissant
Missouri
Around
Dollar
Need
Cute
Children
Ride
Needs
Shoes
Going
Dollars
Long
Missing
Shoe
Like
Living
Chase
People
Kids
Homeless
More quotes by Kathleen Madigan
The bus scares me. Way too many gross people on the bus. Sixty-five people on the bus and I was the last one on. I felt like calling Unsolved Mysteries. 'Yeah, I found everybody.
Kathleen Madigan
I bowled for two years in college, because I was drunk and needed shoes.
Kathleen Madigan
I never have goals or dreams. My sister says it's pathetic and lazy, but I had a goal, to tell jokes to pay bills and not have to live in a trailer. So, I think I'm living my fantasy. I don't have another.
Kathleen Madigan
Some people are mean, and when you look at their page, they only write mean things, but I have a great time with a twitter person. It's not even to promote myself, just to entertain me.
Kathleen Madigan
People entertain me more than I entertain them.
Kathleen Madigan
I don't really write jokes. I wait for stuff to happen in life, and then I tell it on stage.
Kathleen Madigan