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I don't want to go about offending people, that's not my plan.

Karl Pilkington

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Karl Pilkington
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: September 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Television Actor
Television Personality
Television Presenter
Writer
Sale
Cheshire
Plans
People
Offending
Plan

More quotes by Karl Pilkington

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People always tell me I'm going to regret not having kids. But what if I have one and then I regret having it? Has anyone thought of that option?
Karl Pilkington
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If you'd have told me five years ago that I'd have done all this - two books, some television and everything - I'd panic, I'd be scared.
Karl Pilkington
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But I'm not an idiot. At the end of the day, I've learned a lot.
Karl Pilkington
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I know when I was a kid I ate a beetle. I ate a beetle because I thought it was licorice.
Karl Pilkington
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How would I know which one I was?
Karl Pilkington
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If you don't sleep you get run down. Sloths never get a flu, cos its good innit thats when your body's replemishing.
Karl Pilkington
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People say having kids is life changing, well that doesn't necessarily mean a good thing, does it? I could take one of my legs off. That would change my life.
Karl Pilkington
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[Jellyfish] are 97% water or something, so how much are they doing? Just give them another 3% and make them water. It's more useful.
Karl Pilkington
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The poorer people and criminals of Mexico who are not very religious but not quite atheists, either, worship Saint Death.
Karl Pilkington
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Could the world fall?
Karl Pilkington
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Be the ugly one, look at the nice one.
Karl Pilkington
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People moan about drugs being tested on animals. I sort of think it depends innit. If the drug's aspirin and the monkey's got a headache, is it right?
Karl Pilkington
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I don't really like surprises. Not big ones anyway. Just having a pack of Revels holds enough of a surprise for me.
Karl Pilkington
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If you’re worrying about the wrinkles on your bollocks I’d say your life’s pretty good
Karl Pilkington
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I mean, I am into nature and seeing whales. I went whale-watching, and I was really looking forward to that, but when you see it on TV and you see other programs do it, you're seeing close-ups of these massive creatures, and the music that's added gives you a certain feeling.
Karl Pilkington
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This is the problem with over-crowded inner-city schools there aren't enough parts for everyone in the nativity story.
Karl Pilkington
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I've heard that fact, that is you eat more than six bananas it will kill you. I saw a bowl with seven bananas in it and I thought, that's dangerous.
Karl Pilkington
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There is no need for ants to have the ability to fly
Karl Pilkington
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The reason I did the book about holidays is that you're a different person on holiday. You're sleeping somewhere unfamiliar, knocking about with people you've never met and for 10 days you're someone else. You're out of your comfortable zone.
Karl Pilkington
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There is someone for everyone, i'nt there. That's always my thing. And it's reassuring I think.
Karl Pilkington