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I'm a bit rubbish at knowing when something is good. But if it goes out and I can say, I wasn't as bad as I thought I would be, then I'll be happy. Until then, I'll be thinking, I shouldn't be here!
Karl Pilkington
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Karl Pilkington
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: September 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Television Actor
Television Personality
Television Presenter
Writer
Sale
Cheshire
Bits
Knowing
Happy
Thought
Something
Rubbish
Good
Shouldn
Would
Goes
Thinking
Wasn
More quotes by Karl Pilkington
Neil Armstrong, that spaceman, he went to the moon but he ain't been back. It can't have been that good.
Karl Pilkington
Whether it's a potato or a nut, it's a foodage!
Karl Pilkington
I say have the night and give people the awards, but why do people want to watch people win awards? What are they getting out of it? I don't quite get it. Because they have awards all the time there's awards for butchers, the best meat served, but they don't televise it. I don't know why they do it for films or TV programs.
Karl Pilkington
The Web is the new book though, innit?
Karl Pilkington
Sometimes you can know too much. A lot of brainy people like Stephen Fry are quite depressive.
Karl Pilkington
You don't have to do it straight away, but just do it before it gets really bad.
Karl Pilkington
Why is it alright to be going around, going mental with a gun, shooting all the monkeys and killing them? Because one day we're going to run out.
Karl Pilkington
Happiness is like a cake: have too much of it and you get sick of it.
Karl Pilkington
I've heard that fact, that is you eat more than six bananas it will kill you. I saw a bowl with seven bananas in it and I thought, that's dangerous.
Karl Pilkington
What's that plate that's above a saucer but below a plate?
Karl Pilkington
I don't know any Londoners 'cos I'm from Manchester.
Karl Pilkington
A problem solved is a problem caused.
Karl Pilkington
People always tell me I'm going to regret not having kids. But what if I have one and then I regret having it? Has anyone thought of that option?
Karl Pilkington
[Jellyfish] are 97% water or something, so how much are they doing? Just give them another 3% and make them water. It's more useful.
Karl Pilkington
Normally you can't hear you're own voice because you're talking over it.
Karl Pilkington
There is someone for everyone, i'nt there. That's always my thing. And it's reassuring I think.
Karl Pilkington
A dog has got human eyes.
Karl Pilkington
You never get an angry man suddenly breaking into a whistle.
Karl Pilkington
There’s fish in here that I’ve read about that are so see-through that they’re invisible. So I don’t even think they know they exist.
Karl Pilkington
Apparently you're not allowed to lick a toad's back.
Karl Pilkington
