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If you'd have told me five years ago that I'd have done all this - two books, some television and everything - I'd panic, I'd be scared.
Karl Pilkington
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Karl Pilkington
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: September 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Television Actor
Television Personality
Television Presenter
Writer
Sale
Cheshire
Years
Told
Television
Books
Five
Two
Everything
Book
Panic
Done
Scared
More quotes by Karl Pilkington
If you’re worrying about the wrinkles on your bollocks I’d say your life’s pretty good
Karl Pilkington
A block of blood should not have the word cake after it...they might as well say shite gateau
Karl Pilkington
That impresses me more, inventin' electricity.
Karl Pilkington
Neil Armstrong, that spaceman, he went to the moon but he ain't been back. It can't have been that good.
Karl Pilkington
Normally you can't hear you're own voice because you're talking over it.
Karl Pilkington
She gave me the jabs and said I was covered for every worst-case scenario, including being bitten by a dirty chimp. I told her this is why we have over-population problems. Why are idiots who annoy dirty chimps being protected?
Karl Pilkington
Apparently you're not allowed to lick a toad's back.
Karl Pilkington
A single vision is more perfect than a committee vision because with everyone having their say, it becomes compromised.
Karl Pilkington
If you don't have a plan, you can end up doing some interesting things.
Karl Pilkington
People moan about drugs being tested on animals. I sort of think it depends innit. If the drug's aspirin and the monkey's got a headache, is it right?
Karl Pilkington
I don’t understand why people take pictures of mimes. Everyone looks like a mime in a picture.
Karl Pilkington
Knowledge is almost annoying.
Karl Pilkington
I know when I was a kid I ate a beetle. I ate a beetle because I thought it was licorice.
Karl Pilkington
There was always something. It's like with this one, there's always something that's mad that I look back on it and go, that's pretty amazing to say that I've done that or been there.
Karl Pilkington
The cafe was called Tattoos. The fella who owned it didn't have any tattoos... but we never saw his wife.
Karl Pilkington
Me in a one-man tent crouching over carrier bag. It's not just the lowest point of the trip. It's the lowest point ever. In 38 years.
Karl Pilkington
I don't know any Londoners 'cos I'm from Manchester.
Karl Pilkington
Well I'm trying to think what I put in... I think I put in 'why?' to see if I'd confuse the computer.
Karl Pilkington
I've been on the planet for 40 years now, and I'm still none the wiser as to what it's all about really. I've never worried about life's big questions. People at my age sit about pondering, 'Why are we here?' The only time I ever asked myself that is when Suzanne booked us a surprise holiday to Lanzarote.
Karl Pilkington
It's interesting to see that people had so much clutter even thousands of years ago. The only way to get rid of it all was to bury it, and then some archaeologist went and dug it all up.
Karl Pilkington
