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Be the ugly one, look at the nice one.

Karl Pilkington

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Karl Pilkington
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: September 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Television Actor
Television Personality
Television Presenter
Writer
Sale
Cheshire
Looks
Ugly
Nice
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More quotes by Karl Pilkington

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The Chichen Itza is just a pyramid with four sides, with stairs on each side leading to some kind of bungalow on the top.
Karl Pilkington
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If you can't do it, don't do it.
Karl Pilkington
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The reason I did the book about holidays is that you're a different person on holiday. You're sleeping somewhere unfamiliar, knocking about with people you've never met and for 10 days you're someone else. You're out of your comfortable zone.
Karl Pilkington
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Sometimes you can know too much. A lot of brainy people like Stephen Fry are quite depressive.
Karl Pilkington
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Happiness is like a cake: have too much of it and you get sick of it.
Karl Pilkington
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People say having kids is life changing, well that doesn't necessarily mean a good thing, does it? I could take one of my legs off. That would change my life.
Karl Pilkington
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I think people would live a bit longer if they didn't know how old they were. Age puts restrictions on things.
Karl Pilkington
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I don't really like surprises. Not big ones anyway. Just having a pack of Revels holds enough of a surprise for me.
Karl Pilkington
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I say have the night and give people the awards, but why do people want to watch people win awards? What are they getting out of it? I don't quite get it. Because they have awards all the time there's awards for butchers, the best meat served, but they don't televise it. I don't know why they do it for films or TV programs.
Karl Pilkington
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You never get an angry man suddenly breaking into a whistle.
Karl Pilkington
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I don't watch much telly, the telly hardly goes on, but the things I do watch are sort of nature programs, and something about the oceans and the amount of weird fish that's in there.
Karl Pilkington
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The Elephant Man would never have gotten up and gone, ‘Oh, God. Look at me hair today.’
Karl Pilkington
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We came from the sea originally, now we're going back in it. Don't go in it, unless you're in a boat.
Karl Pilkington
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I'm really happy. I just don't choose to show it.
Karl Pilkington
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I don't think I'd be a very good parent. I'd be too honest.
Karl Pilkington
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Knowledge is almost annoying.
Karl Pilkington
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With identical twins, you always get a little snidey one.
Karl Pilkington
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I never buy a piece of art. I don't see the point in buying something because I know my eyes will get bored of it eventually.
Karl Pilkington
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From someone whose dad buys him a spade for Christmas, I thought you'd be grateful!
Karl Pilkington
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We're gonna get weaker. That's already happened. They used to say, you know, an apple a day keeps the doctor away. Now they're saying eat five fruits. That's evidence. You can't argue with that.
Karl Pilkington