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We all just want to sit on our ass.
Karl Pilkington
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Karl Pilkington
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: September 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Television Actor
Television Personality
Television Presenter
Writer
Sale
Cheshire
Ass
More quotes by Karl Pilkington
We're gonna get weaker. That's already happened. They used to say, you know, an apple a day keeps the doctor away. Now they're saying eat five fruits. That's evidence. You can't argue with that.
Karl Pilkington
I'd say the best is when I was in Africa, I saw a hippo in a house. Someone had a pet hippo. And they're meant to be one of the most dangerous animals on the planet, and they had one that was sort of just wandering in and out of their house, just sort of roaming about.
Karl Pilkington
Normally you can't hear you're own voice because you're talking over it.
Karl Pilkington
If you live in a glass house, don't be chucking stuff about.
Karl Pilkington
The reason I did the book about holidays is that you're a different person on holiday. You're sleeping somewhere unfamiliar, knocking about with people you've never met and for 10 days you're someone else. You're out of your comfortable zone.
Karl Pilkington
If you had five photos of anuses, I could not point mine out.
Karl Pilkington
Me in a one-man tent crouching over carrier bag. It's not just the lowest point of the trip. It's the lowest point ever. In 38 years.
Karl Pilkington
A problem solved is a problem caused.
Karl Pilkington
Whether it's a potato or a nut, it's a foodage!
Karl Pilkington
There’s fish in here that I’ve read about that are so see-through that they’re invisible. So I don’t even think they know they exist.
Karl Pilkington
It's like the panda, they say that's dying out. But what do they do? When you see them they're just sitting in the jungle eating.
Karl Pilkington
You don't have to do it straight away, but just do it before it gets really bad.
Karl Pilkington
A dog has got human eyes.
Karl Pilkington
For me, a good holiday is about value for money rather than things to see.
Karl Pilkington
Why is it alright to be going around, going mental with a gun, shooting all the monkeys and killing them? Because one day we're going to run out.
Karl Pilkington
People say if bees die out, the world would end apparently. Now, I don't know if that's true, if that's some bee enthusiast who managed to write a good document and people believe this.
Karl Pilkington
You know, when you're a producer, you're a bit of a lackey. You're just making cups of tea and making sure they've got newspaper, stuff like that.
Karl Pilkington
A block of blood should not have the word cake after it...they might as well say shite gateau
Karl Pilkington
There is no need for ants to have the ability to fly
Karl Pilkington
Yesterday, I did some painting then went out to buy an onion and came home and watched 'University Challenge.' The onion was probably the highlight.
Karl Pilkington