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I know who I am. Bloody hell, I'm getting enough bills for Karl Pilkington so I hope I am him, 'cos if I'm not, I have no idea who I'm paying for

Karl Pilkington

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Karl Pilkington
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: September 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Television Actor
Television Personality
Television Presenter
Writer
Sale
Cheshire
Enough
Paying
Bills
Stupid
Hell
Getting
Hope
Idea
Karl
Ideas
Bloody

More quotes by Karl Pilkington

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I'm really happy. I just don't choose to show it.
Karl Pilkington
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I mean, I am into nature and seeing whales. I went whale-watching, and I was really looking forward to that, but when you see it on TV and you see other programs do it, you're seeing close-ups of these massive creatures, and the music that's added gives you a certain feeling.
Karl Pilkington
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If Camels are the ship of the dessert, this one is the Titanic
Karl Pilkington
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The Web is the new book though, innit?
Karl Pilkington
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I find that if you just talk, your mouth comes up with stuff.
Karl Pilkington
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A block of blood should not have the word cake after it...they might as well say shite gateau
Karl Pilkington
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But I'm not an idiot. At the end of the day, I've learned a lot.
Karl Pilkington
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They do it in Thai restaurants in London. You ask for a drink, and it comes in a glass with loads of seaweed and pebbles in it like a scene from Finding Nemo.
Karl Pilkington
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It's like the panda, they say that's dying out. But what do they do? When you see them they're just sitting in the jungle eating.
Karl Pilkington
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Well...like, when you're born, you're a little baby, you're wrinkly and stuff, when you get older you sort of morph into a baby again.
Karl Pilkington
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This is the problem with over-crowded inner-city schools there aren't enough parts for everyone in the nativity story.
Karl Pilkington
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What happens if someone else has my eyes, and they start looking at stuff I don't like? I don't like the idea of that.
Karl Pilkington
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I'm just sayin', I don't like fun.
Karl Pilkington
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It's not a joke: I really do like being at home.
Karl Pilkington
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I found that being with happy positive people annoys me.
Karl Pilkington
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People who live in a glass house have to answer the door.
Karl Pilkington
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Could the world fall?
Karl Pilkington
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If you had five photos of anuses, I could not point mine out.
Karl Pilkington
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Yesterday, I did some painting then went out to buy an onion and came home and watched 'University Challenge.' The onion was probably the highlight.
Karl Pilkington
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Why didn't evolution make a giraffe good at carpentry so it could build a ladder?
Karl Pilkington