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I've always wanted to kick a duck up the arse
Karl Pilkington
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Karl Pilkington
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: September 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Television Actor
Television Personality
Television Presenter
Writer
Sale
Cheshire
Kicks
Wanted
Always
Arse
Arses
Duck
Ducks
Kick
More quotes by Karl Pilkington
It's not easy keeping a diary. You have to be pretty committed.
Karl Pilkington
Cat food. It stinks a bit, but if you don't put up with the smell, the little kitten will die.
Karl Pilkington
Whether it's a potato or a nut, it's a foodage!
Karl Pilkington
The Chichen Itza is just a pyramid with four sides, with stairs on each side leading to some kind of bungalow on the top.
Karl Pilkington
And we've got a toaster and everything. So there is no reason for the wedding.
Karl Pilkington
It's weird how me and that insect are miles apart in terms of lifestyle, yet we both like a biscuit.
Karl Pilkington
Fishing: I don't really like it. I don't really like the expression on the fish's face.
Karl Pilkington
If you don't sleep you get run down. Sloths never get a flu, cos its good innit thats when your body's replemishing.
Karl Pilkington
We all just want to sit on our ass.
Karl Pilkington
It's interesting to see that people had so much clutter even thousands of years ago. The only way to get rid of it all was to bury it, and then some archaeologist went and dug it all up.
Karl Pilkington
Does the brain control you or are you controlling the brain? I don't know if I'm in charge of mine.
Karl Pilkington
A block of blood should not have the word cake after it...they might as well say shite gateau
Karl Pilkington
There is someone for everyone, i'nt there. That's always my thing. And it's reassuring I think.
Karl Pilkington
The reason there are so many gyms in London is because the amount of gay people who are here now.
Karl Pilkington
I've been on the planet for 40 years now, and I'm still none the wiser as to what it's all about really. I've never worried about life's big questions. People at my age sit about pondering, 'Why are we here?' The only time I ever asked myself that is when Suzanne booked us a surprise holiday to Lanzarote.
Karl Pilkington
That impresses me more, inventin' electricity.
Karl Pilkington
[Jellyfish] are 97% water or something, so how much are they doing? Just give them another 3% and make them water. It's more useful.
Karl Pilkington
People say if bees die out, the world would end apparently. Now, I don't know if that's true, if that's some bee enthusiast who managed to write a good document and people believe this.
Karl Pilkington
I came up with a good idea... see-through skin.
Karl Pilkington
The great pyramid is overrated. It's a bad design. The lounge is going to be huge, but the bedroom is going to be tiny.
Karl Pilkington
