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The Web is the new book though, innit?

Karl Pilkington

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Karl Pilkington
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: September 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Television Actor
Television Personality
Television Presenter
Writer
Sale
Cheshire
Though
Book

More quotes by Karl Pilkington

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It's weird how me and that insect are miles apart in terms of lifestyle, yet we both like a biscuit.
Karl Pilkington
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Well...like, when you're born, you're a little baby, you're wrinkly and stuff, when you get older you sort of morph into a baby again.
Karl Pilkington
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We're gonna get weaker. That's already happened. They used to say, you know, an apple a day keeps the doctor away. Now they're saying eat five fruits. That's evidence. You can't argue with that.
Karl Pilkington
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I don't know any Londoners 'cos I'm from Manchester.
Karl Pilkington
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If you’re worrying about the wrinkles on your bollocks I’d say your life’s pretty good
Karl Pilkington
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For me, a good holiday is about value for money rather than things to see.
Karl Pilkington
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I don't really like surprises. Not big ones anyway. Just having a pack of Revels holds enough of a surprise for me.
Karl Pilkington
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What happens if someone else has my eyes, and they start looking at stuff I don't like? I don't like the idea of that.
Karl Pilkington
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It's like the panda, they say that's dying out. But what do they do? When you see them they're just sitting in the jungle eating.
Karl Pilkington
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I was impressed by the Taj Mahal. A good bit of work, well looked after, worth paying money to see.
Karl Pilkington
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I am pessimistic, I think that's the best way to be, because if you're always expecting the best - the best doesn't always happen. Nine times out of 10 it doesn't. I'm surprised when things go smoothly. I don't know what's wrong with being pessimistic - unless you are such a pessimist that you don't do anything.
Karl Pilkington
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I don't think I'd be a very good parent. I'd be too honest.
Karl Pilkington
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The Tudors, I don't even know if I had a family back then.
Karl Pilkington
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It's like there's some unwritten rule that if you're mates, you can say what you want to each other, and you don't really get that annoyed about it.
Karl Pilkington
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There’s fish in here that I’ve read about that are so see-through that they’re invisible. So I don’t even think they know they exist.
Karl Pilkington
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They do it in Thai restaurants in London. You ask for a drink, and it comes in a glass with loads of seaweed and pebbles in it like a scene from Finding Nemo.
Karl Pilkington
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Why didn't evolution make a giraffe good at carpentry so it could build a ladder?
Karl Pilkington
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People moan about drugs being tested on animals. I sort of think it depends innit. If the drug's aspirin and the monkey's got a headache, is it right?
Karl Pilkington
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Does the brain control you or are you controlling the brain? I don't know if I'm in charge of mine.
Karl Pilkington
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I'm a bit rubbish at knowing when something is good. But if it goes out and I can say, I wasn't as bad as I thought I would be, then I'll be happy. Until then, I'll be thinking, I shouldn't be here!
Karl Pilkington