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This is the problem with over-crowded inner-city schools there aren't enough parts for everyone in the nativity story.
Karl Pilkington
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Karl Pilkington
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: September 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Television Actor
Television Personality
Television Presenter
Writer
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Cheshire
Everyone
Crowded
Stories
Schools
Parts
School
Inner
Problem
Aren
Enough
City
Cities
Story
Nativity
More quotes by Karl Pilkington
Me mum used to always have the radio on - even now she has it on in every room. Me girlfriend sort of blames that reason for me not doing that well at school - constant noise, really.
Karl Pilkington
The Tudors, I don't even know if I had a family back then.
Karl Pilkington
People moan about drugs being tested on animals. I sort of think it depends innit. If the drug's aspirin and the monkey's got a headache, is it right?
Karl Pilkington
If you’re worrying about the wrinkles on your bollocks I’d say your life’s pretty good
Karl Pilkington
It's just hassle of having friends and family an' that.
Karl Pilkington
The great pyramid is overrated. It's a bad design. The lounge is going to be huge, but the bedroom is going to be tiny.
Karl Pilkington
Sometimes you can know too much. A lot of brainy people like Stephen Fry are quite depressive.
Karl Pilkington
What's that plate that's above a saucer but below a plate?
Karl Pilkington
Apparently you're not allowed to lick a toad's back.
Karl Pilkington
By 78 you've done everything you're going to do. If you haven't bungee-jumped by the time you're 78 you're not going to do it.
Karl Pilkington
They do it in Thai restaurants in London. You ask for a drink, and it comes in a glass with loads of seaweed and pebbles in it like a scene from Finding Nemo.
Karl Pilkington
If you don't have a plan, you can end up doing some interesting things.
Karl Pilkington
She gave me the jabs and said I was covered for every worst-case scenario, including being bitten by a dirty chimp. I told her this is why we have over-population problems. Why are idiots who annoy dirty chimps being protected?
Karl Pilkington
I know when I was a kid I ate a beetle. I ate a beetle because I thought it was licorice.
Karl Pilkington
We all just want to sit on our ass.
Karl Pilkington
I found that being with happy positive people annoys me.
Karl Pilkington
As long as you're remembering baby Jesus, does it matter when you're remembering him. That's what I'm saying about Christmas, I might not be in the mood for it December 25th.
Karl Pilkington
Well I'm trying to think what I put in... I think I put in 'why?' to see if I'd confuse the computer.
Karl Pilkington
A slug is always on its own. It's a lonely insect.
Karl Pilkington
We're gonna get weaker. That's already happened. They used to say, you know, an apple a day keeps the doctor away. Now they're saying eat five fruits. That's evidence. You can't argue with that.
Karl Pilkington
