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She gave me the jabs and said I was covered for every worst-case scenario, including being bitten by a dirty chimp. I told her this is why we have over-population problems. Why are idiots who annoy dirty chimps being protected?
Karl Pilkington
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Karl Pilkington
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: September 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Television Actor
Television Personality
Television Presenter
Writer
Sale
Cheshire
Worst
Dirty
Annoy
Problem
Population
Scenario
Every
Including
Idiots
Case
Scenarios
Gave
Annoying
Jabs
Problems
Protected
Chimp
Cases
Covered
Chimps
Told
Idiot
Bitten
More quotes by Karl Pilkington
Who'd have thought the Frisbee would have caught on?
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The great pyramid is overrated. It's a bad design. The lounge is going to be huge, but the bedroom is going to be tiny.
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Happiness is like a cake: have too much of it and you get sick of it.
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With identical twins, you always get a little snidey one.
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We came from the sea originally, now we're going back in it. Don't go in it, unless you're in a boat.
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Everywhere we walked we got plenty of attention due to the camera and sound men. The locals love to get on camera. [...] I'd seen footage of Gandhi surrounded like this and always thought it was because he was very popular, but now I wonder if it was just because he had a camera crew with him.
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I just sort of go along and say what I think -and that's all you can do in life, really.
Karl Pilkington
It's interesting to see that people had so much clutter even thousands of years ago. The only way to get rid of it all was to bury it, and then some archaeologist went and dug it all up.
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The Chichen Itza is just a pyramid with four sides, with stairs on each side leading to some kind of bungalow on the top.
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I don't want to go about offending people, that's not my plan.
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For me, a good holiday is about value for money rather than things to see.
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Classes teaching you how to breathe. I'm 32, I think I've got the hang of it.
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Me mum used to always have the radio on - even now she has it on in every room. Me girlfriend sort of blames that reason for me not doing that well at school - constant noise, really.
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The reason I did the book about holidays is that you're a different person on holiday. You're sleeping somewhere unfamiliar, knocking about with people you've never met and for 10 days you're someone else. You're out of your comfortable zone.
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Everyone is living for everyone else now. They're doing stuff so they can tell other people about it. I don't get all that social media stuff, I've always got other things I want to do - odd jobs around the house. No one wants to hear about that.
Karl Pilkington
A slug is always on its own. It's a lonely insect.
Karl Pilkington
I think people would live a bit longer if they didn't know how old they were. Age puts restrictions on things.
Karl Pilkington
The poorer people and criminals of Mexico who are not very religious but not quite atheists, either, worship Saint Death.
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It's not a joke: I really do like being at home.
Karl Pilkington
A problem solved is a problem caused.
Karl Pilkington
