Quote

She gave me the jabs and said I was covered for every worst-case scenario, including being bitten by a dirty chimp. I told her this is why we have over-population problems. Why are idiots who annoy dirty chimps being protected?

Karl Pilkington

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Karl Pilkington
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: September 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Television Actor
Television Personality
Television Presenter
Writer
Sale
Cheshire
Problems
Protected
Chimp
Cases
Covered
Chimps
Told
Idiot
Bitten
Worst
Dirty
Annoy
Problem
Population
Scenario
Every
Including
Idiots
Case
Scenarios
Gave
Annoying
Jabs

More quotes by Karl Pilkington

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The cafe was called Tattoos. The fella who owned it didn't have any tattoos... but we never saw his wife.
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I came up with a good idea... see-through skin.
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A problem solved is a problem caused.
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I don’t understand why people take pictures of mimes. Everyone looks like a mime in a picture.
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I found that being with happy positive people annoys me.
Karl Pilkington
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People moan about drugs being tested on animals. I sort of think it depends innit. If the drug's aspirin and the monkey's got a headache, is it right?
Karl Pilkington
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I'm more open to give things a go, but what I'm not good at yet is holding back. If something is daft or rubbish, I just go, I can't be doing it.
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For me, a good holiday is about value for money rather than things to see.
Karl Pilkington
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I'm really happy. I just don't choose to show it.
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There was always something. It's like with this one, there's always something that's mad that I look back on it and go, that's pretty amazing to say that I've done that or been there.
Karl Pilkington
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It's not a joke: I really do like being at home.
Karl Pilkington
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It's just hassle of having friends and family an' that.
Karl Pilkington
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Could the world fall?
Karl Pilkington
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I'm not a proper traveler. I don't like to be challenged or have too much of a change and prefer a week away just to relax.
Karl Pilkington
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This is the problem with over-crowded inner-city schools there aren't enough parts for everyone in the nativity story.
Karl Pilkington
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Cat food. It stinks a bit, but if you don't put up with the smell, the little kitten will die.
Karl Pilkington
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What I mean is, I don't know what I mean.
Karl Pilkington
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It's like there's some unwritten rule that if you're mates, you can say what you want to each other, and you don't really get that annoyed about it.
Karl Pilkington
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If you’re worrying about the wrinkles on your bollocks I’d say your life’s pretty good
Karl Pilkington
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The Elephant Man would never have gotten up and gone, ‘Oh, God. Look at me hair today.’
Karl Pilkington