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She gave me the jabs and said I was covered for every worst-case scenario, including being bitten by a dirty chimp. I told her this is why we have over-population problems. Why are idiots who annoy dirty chimps being protected?
Karl Pilkington
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Karl Pilkington
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: September 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Television Actor
Television Personality
Television Presenter
Writer
Sale
Cheshire
Told
Idiot
Bitten
Worst
Dirty
Annoy
Problem
Population
Scenario
Every
Including
Idiots
Case
Scenarios
Gave
Annoying
Jabs
Problems
Protected
Chimp
Cases
Covered
Chimps
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There was always something. It's like with this one, there's always something that's mad that I look back on it and go, that's pretty amazing to say that I've done that or been there.
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Be the ugly one, look at the nice one.
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People always tell me I'm going to regret not having kids. But what if I have one and then I regret having it? Has anyone thought of that option?
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I've learnt that, even though I've travelled about, I haven't changed that much.
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I know who I am. Bloody hell, I'm getting enough bills for Karl Pilkington so I hope I am him, 'cos if I'm not, I have no idea who I'm paying for
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A single vision is more perfect than a committee vision because with everyone having their say, it becomes compromised.
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The cafe was called Tattoos. The fella who owned it didn't have any tattoos... but we never saw his wife.
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People say having kids is life changing, well that doesn't necessarily mean a good thing, does it? I could take one of my legs off. That would change my life.
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The Tudors, I don't even know if I had a family back then.
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It's weird how me and that insect are miles apart in terms of lifestyle, yet we both like a biscuit.
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I don't want to go about offending people, that's not my plan.
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Neil Armstrong, that spaceman, he went to the moon but he ain't been back. It can't have been that good.
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Yesterday, I did some painting then went out to buy an onion and came home and watched 'University Challenge.' The onion was probably the highlight.
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And we've got a toaster and everything. So there is no reason for the wedding.
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I've heard that fact, that is you eat more than six bananas it will kill you. I saw a bowl with seven bananas in it and I thought, that's dangerous.
Karl Pilkington
