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But I'm not an idiot. At the end of the day, I've learned a lot.

Karl Pilkington

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Karl Pilkington
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: September 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Television Actor
Television Personality
Television Presenter
Writer
Sale
Cheshire
Learned
Ends
Idiot

More quotes by Karl Pilkington

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I've heard that fact, that is you eat more than six bananas it will kill you. I saw a bowl with seven bananas in it and I thought, that's dangerous.
Karl Pilkington
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I'm more open to give things a go, but what I'm not good at yet is holding back. If something is daft or rubbish, I just go, I can't be doing it.
Karl Pilkington
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It's like the panda, they say that's dying out. But what do they do? When you see them they're just sitting in the jungle eating.
Karl Pilkington
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Neil Armstrong, that spaceman, he went to the moon but he ain't been back. It can't have been that good.
Karl Pilkington
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Cat food. It stinks a bit, but if you don't put up with the smell, the little kitten will die.
Karl Pilkington
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The Elephant Man would never have gotten up and gone, ‘Oh, God. Look at me hair today.’
Karl Pilkington
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It's weird how me and that insect are miles apart in terms of lifestyle, yet we both like a biscuit.
Karl Pilkington
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How would I know which one I was?
Karl Pilkington
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I'm not a proper traveler. I don't like to be challenged or have too much of a change and prefer a week away just to relax.
Karl Pilkington
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A dog has got human eyes.
Karl Pilkington
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I am pessimistic, I think that's the best way to be, because if you're always expecting the best - the best doesn't always happen. Nine times out of 10 it doesn't. I'm surprised when things go smoothly. I don't know what's wrong with being pessimistic - unless you are such a pessimist that you don't do anything.
Karl Pilkington
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I don’t understand why people take pictures of mimes. Everyone looks like a mime in a picture.
Karl Pilkington
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I don't think I'd be a very good parent. I'd be too honest.
Karl Pilkington
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The cafe was called Tattoos. The fella who owned it didn't have any tattoos... but we never saw his wife.
Karl Pilkington
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Be the ugly one, look at the nice one.
Karl Pilkington
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Sometimes you can know too much. A lot of brainy people like Stephen Fry are quite depressive.
Karl Pilkington
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Now sometimes I don't know if I feel well. Because I've been in my body for years.
Karl Pilkington
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She gave me the jabs and said I was covered for every worst-case scenario, including being bitten by a dirty chimp. I told her this is why we have over-population problems. Why are idiots who annoy dirty chimps being protected?
Karl Pilkington
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Why didn't evolution make a giraffe good at carpentry so it could build a ladder?
Karl Pilkington
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What's that plate that's above a saucer but below a plate?
Karl Pilkington