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Only those who haven't got the wit to speak for themselves would ever want their clothes to do it for them.
Julie Burchill
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Julie Burchill
Age: 65
Born: 1959
Born: July 3
Journalist
Novelist
Writer
Frenchay
Gloucestershire
Wit
Havens
Haven
Clothes
Speak
Ever
Would
More quotes by Julie Burchill
It must be said that Brighton, unlike London, makes driving seem very appealing. Instead of glowering faces and angry horns on all sides, we have the coast road in front of us and the Sussex Downs just 10 minutes behind us.
Julie Burchill
Sadly, a lot of what passes for feminism these days is just moaning about men, congratulating ourselves on nothing in particular, and mocking them for being big kids while doing everything we can to keep them that way.
Julie Burchill
I'll declare my own interest right here at the start and admit that, like the vast majority of people, I find youthful looks appealing.
Julie Burchill
If you want sex, have an affair. If you want a relationship, buy a dog.
Julie Burchill
A wedding is a funeral which masquerades as a feast. And the greater the pageantry, the deeper the savagery.
Julie Burchill
As a precocious teen I dreamed of being Graham Greene. Well, as it turned out, I never wrote a great novel, sadly, and I never converted to Catholicism, happily, but I did do one thing he did. That is, in middle age I moved to a seaside town and got into a right barney with the local powers-that-be.
Julie Burchill
As a kid, I grew to define what I didn't want my life to be like by sitting behind moaning women on the bus, hearing them bang on about their aches and pains, both real and imagined.
Julie Burchill
I almost choke on my popcorn when I hear film stars, who walk on red carpets as much as the rest of us do on zebra crossings, criticising youngsters who crave fame.
Julie Burchill
And call me a pig, but isn't it brilliantly refreshing how early the Dutch eat dinner? When they're still laying out the cutlery in achingly hip Barcelona, they're hanging the Closed sign on the restaurant doors of old Amsterdam.
Julie Burchill
Being a monarchist, and fawning over those 'above' you, you must naturally despise those 'below' or on the same socioeconomic level as yourself, because that is how hierarchy worship works.
Julie Burchill
I have experienced jealousy, possessiveness, verbal abuse and violence from men, but I have also experienced jealousy, possessiveness, verbal abuse and violence from women, usually when I failed to respond to their advances.
Julie Burchill
Surely being a Professional Beauty - let alone an ageing one - is one of the most insecure and doomed careers imaginable.
Julie Burchill
My favourite spectator sport is watching people who should know better searching for something, and often claiming to find it, where it never could be. Women claiming to find feminism in Islam is a good one.
Julie Burchill
It's received wisdom that the English are uniquely child-unfriendly.
Julie Burchill
Whenever I am sent a new book on the lively arts, the first thing I do is look for myself in the index.
Julie Burchill
When a man wants to relax, he will slob out and really relax. Or he will pursue a hobby - anything from building models to watching sport.
Julie Burchill
I have always voted Labour and I always will. I have got to have one stupid, bovine part of me and that's the part that votes Labour.
Julie Burchill
I feel I'm trying to get this really crap car going, and it just keeps stalling on me. And then other times I feel like my life's a train thundering toward me, and I'm in a car stuck on the crossroads and can't get out. Isn't it great being young!
Julie Burchill
Show me a frigid woman and, nine times out of ten, I'll show you a little man.
Julie Burchill
Women, more often than not, do things which aren't remotely relaxing but are all about preening, which is just another sort of work.
Julie Burchill