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I didn't cry when I left free-booting, smash-and-grab papers that would have appeared to be far more natural homes for me and, at the risk of being vulgar, paid far better for my services.

Julie Burchill

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Julie Burchill
Age: 65
Born: 1959
Born: July 3
Journalist
Novelist
Writer
Frenchay
Gloucestershire
Home
Cry
Better
Paid
Smash
Would
Paper
Grab
Risk
Appeared
Free
Vulgar
Natural
Papers
Left
Homes
Didn
Services

More quotes by Julie Burchill

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Some say that Cusk has no sense of humour, but expecting giggles from this writer would be akin to expecting sonnets from Benny Hill.
Julie Burchill
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The allegedly 'classy' magazines often seem to be in an endless, undeclared competition to see who can climb furthest up the fundament of Gwyneth Paltrow or Jennifer Lopez.
Julie Burchill
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What I find most upsetting about this new all-consuming beauty culture is that the obsession with good looks, and how you can supposedly attain them, is almost entirely female-driven.
Julie Burchill
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The pictures from the first professional photo session that the young David Beckham submitted himself to are extraordinary. He has a barely suppressed smile, as though he and the cameraman are complicit in the understanding that this is not yet David Beckham we see and that there is an element of deceit in selling the photographs as such
Julie Burchill
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If you want sex, have an affair. If you want a relationship, buy a dog.
Julie Burchill
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It may be a cliché, but it's true - the build-up to Christmas is so much more pleasurable than the actual day itself.
Julie Burchill
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It must be said that Brighton, unlike London, makes driving seem very appealing. Instead of glowering faces and angry horns on all sides, we have the coast road in front of us and the Sussex Downs just 10 minutes behind us.
Julie Burchill
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Prostitution is the supreme triumph of capitalism. When the sex war is won prostitutes should be shot as collaborators for their terrible betrayal of all women, for the moral tarring and feathering they give indigenous women who have had the bad luck to live in what they make their humping ground.
Julie Burchill
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I jest, of course premature ejaculation isn't a laughing matter for anyone, except for your friends when you tell them about it on the phone the next morning. My first marriage ended because the main event was invariably over before my husband got his socks off.
Julie Burchill
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It's received wisdom that the English are uniquely child-unfriendly.
Julie Burchill
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When a man wants to relax, he will slob out and really relax. Or he will pursue a hobby - anything from building models to watching sport.
Julie Burchill
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The latest twist on the pampering concept is spa parties, where a group of friends take over an entire spa.
Julie Burchill
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Monarchists frequently declare that without the royal family, Britain would be 'nothing.' What a woeful lack of love for one's country such statements express.
Julie Burchill
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My favourite spectator sport is watching people who should know better searching for something, and often claiming to find it, where it never could be. Women claiming to find feminism in Islam is a good one.
Julie Burchill
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As a child, I wanted only two things - to be left alone to read my library books, and to get away from my provincial hometown and go to London to be a writer. And I always knew that when I got there, I wanted to make loads of money.
Julie Burchill
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Covering up, so far as I can see, is often the accompaniment to far more truly shameful behaviour than stripping off.
Julie Burchill
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Amsterdam has more than 150 canals and 1,250 bridges, but it never seems crowded, nor bent and bitter from fleecing the tourist.
Julie Burchill
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I feel even less patience with transsexuals.
Julie Burchill
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Only those who haven't got the wit to speak for themselves would ever want their clothes to do it for them.
Julie Burchill
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As a precocious teen I dreamed of being Graham Greene. Well, as it turned out, I never wrote a great novel, sadly, and I never converted to Catholicism, happily, but I did do one thing he did. That is, in middle age I moved to a seaside town and got into a right barney with the local powers-that-be.
Julie Burchill