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As a kid, I grew to define what I didn't want my life to be like by sitting behind moaning women on the bus, hearing them bang on about their aches and pains, both real and imagined.

Julie Burchill

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Julie Burchill
Age: 65
Born: 1959
Born: July 3
Journalist
Novelist
Writer
Frenchay
Gloucestershire
Real
Sitting
Bang
Life
Behinds
Bangs
Like
Behind
Pains
Grew
Ache
Pain
Bus
Didn
Imagined
Kids
Define
Aches
Women
Hearing
Moaning

More quotes by Julie Burchill

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A wedding is a funeral which masquerades as a feast. And the greater the pageantry, the deeper the savagery.
Julie Burchill
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Being a monarchist, and fawning over those 'above' you, you must naturally despise those 'below' or on the same socioeconomic level as yourself, because that is how hierarchy worship works.
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Whenever I am sent a new book on the lively arts, the first thing I do is look for myself in the index.
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When a man wants to relax, he will slob out and really relax. Or he will pursue a hobby - anything from building models to watching sport.
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Sex, on the whole, was meant to be short, nasty and brutish. If what you want is cuddling, you should buy a puppy.
Julie Burchill
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Being a monarchist - saying that one small group is born more worthy of respect than another - is just as warped and strange as being a racist.
Julie Burchill
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I jest, of course premature ejaculation isn't a laughing matter for anyone, except for your friends when you tell them about it on the phone the next morning. My first marriage ended because the main event was invariably over before my husband got his socks off.
Julie Burchill
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Amsterdam has more than 150 canals and 1,250 bridges, but it never seems crowded, nor bent and bitter from fleecing the tourist.
Julie Burchill
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It's received wisdom that the English are uniquely child-unfriendly.
Julie Burchill
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Blakes Hotel in South Kensington was a particular favourite of mine during what I affectionately think of as my Restless Years.
Julie Burchill
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As a precocious teen I dreamed of being Graham Greene. Well, as it turned out, I never wrote a great novel, sadly, and I never converted to Catholicism, happily, but I did do one thing he did. That is, in middle age I moved to a seaside town and got into a right barney with the local powers-that-be.
Julie Burchill
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In my third husband I had discovered a blissfully laid-back type who thought it nothing less than hilarious when I misread the map on the way to Wales, so it took us an extra three hours, or when I was sick in a plastic carrier bag during much of the drive back from Devon - a bag that turned out to have a hole in it.
Julie Burchill
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I don't have a spiritual bone in my body but what I am, is religious.
Julie Burchill
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I feel even less patience with transsexuals.
Julie Burchill
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Graham Greene famously said that all writers need a chip of ice in their heart Cusk can come across as the most beautiful ice palace of stalactites and stalagmites, and some people find her company, albeit by proxy, about as inviting as a long weekend in a walk-in frigidaire.
Julie Burchill
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The allegedly 'classy' magazines often seem to be in an endless, undeclared competition to see who can climb furthest up the fundament of Gwyneth Paltrow or Jennifer Lopez.
Julie Burchill
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I have always voted Labour and I always will. I have got to have one stupid, bovine part of me and that's the part that votes Labour.
Julie Burchill
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My favourite spectator sport is watching people who should know better searching for something, and often claiming to find it, where it never could be. Women claiming to find feminism in Islam is a good one.
Julie Burchill
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'Stress' was the catch-all every pamper-pedlar I spoke to used to explain why healthy women feel the need to be regularly patted, petted and preened into a state of babyish beatification.
Julie Burchill
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A woman who looks like a girl and thinks like a man is the best sort, the most enjoyable to be and the most pleasurable to have and to hold.
Julie Burchill