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I know that asshole you were with in college --” “Can we leave that asshole out of it?” Please, gentlemen, one asshole at a time.

Josh Lanyon

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Josh Lanyon
Please
College
Leave
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Gentleman

More quotes by Josh Lanyon

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I love you, Jake whispered. Are you strong enough for this? I made myself comfortable. Said over my shoulder, Sure. Would you tell me if you weren't? I grinned. Maybe. I can't think of a nicer way to commit suicide. That's good. I can't think of a more pleasant way to commit murder.
Josh Lanyon
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I liked you the first time I saw you. You were sitting on the floor surrounded by books, and you looked up when I opened the door and smiled right at me. It felt like you had been waiting for me, like you were welcoming me home.
Josh Lanyon
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Anyone who wasn't half-stoned on pain meds would have instantly realized what a really bad idea this plan was, but since that didn't include me, I didn't worry about it.
Josh Lanyon
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Not as intolerable as being dead, in my opinion, but I'm very fond of me. I would miss me a lot.
Josh Lanyon
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I thought I recognized you. Really? He remembered me looking like Swamp Thing? How flattering.
Josh Lanyon
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Do you still do the clubs?” Jake shakes his head. “You do the clubs because you can’t find what you need at home. I’ve got everything I need. I’ve got the answer to needs I didn’t even know I had.
Josh Lanyon
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Rachel delivered it like an official pronouncement. Like she was one of the fairies gifting Sleeping Beauty's christening: Beauty. Intelligence. Heterosexual.
Josh Lanyon
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Adrien, people get killed all the time. Since when is it your job to find out what happened to them? I'm not usually suspected of murdering them. You have been as long as I've known you.
Josh Lanyon
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I know you've all heard the advice, Show, don't tell. The best writers don't tell you, and quite frankly they don't just show you -- they make you feel it, live it, taste it, touch it. Storytelling is about being in the moment with the characters.
Josh Lanyon
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All cynics are disappointed idealists. The more stars in the eyes, the harder the fall.
Josh Lanyon
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Shrugging out of the damaged shirt, Jake said roughly, “I still dream about you.” “I have nightmares about you.” I dragged my T-shirt over my head, threw it aside.
Josh Lanyon
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He needed fresh air and sunshine. A walk in the woods and afterward a good book to read by the fire. Yeah, that was the life.
Josh Lanyon
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Focus on someone else’s problems for a change, I instructed myself. You need the practice. From now on you’ll have to live in a world you didn’t make up. Horrible thought.
Josh Lanyon
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Like true philosophers I've come to believe that religion is an illusion of childhood, outgrown after proper education.
Josh Lanyon
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I noticed you right away. She gave me an approving look. I like quiet, polite men. And men who wear Hugo Boss. I was hoping you weren't gay. Or that you were only half-gay. Like Paul. Uh...sorry, I said. It's pretty much full-time now. The pay's not great, but the perks...
Josh Lanyon
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I’m never wrong? Who besides Republican presidents and evil masterminds can say that with a straight face?
Josh Lanyon
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I'm not insane. This is very simple, very straightforward. Provided he doesn't kill me, its foolproof.
Josh Lanyon
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I’m not going to let go of you. I’m going to hold you all night. So go ahead and feel whatever you feel. If you’re still craving cocaine, go ahead. You’re safe. You can crave it all you want, but I won’t let go, and if you still feel like you can’t trust yourself in the morning, and it’s what you want, I’ll drive you to rehab myself. Okay? ~ Max
Josh Lanyon
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He scooped up Victoria practically before she hit the ground, well within the five-second rule. If she'd been a potato chip, he could have still eaten her. Not something I particularly wanted to contemplate.
Josh Lanyon
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I'm a thirty-something gay man with a dodgy heart. I sell books for a living. Who wants to read about that?
Josh Lanyon