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Then, like a born and bred asshole, he added to the sheriff, He writes murder mysteries.

Josh Lanyon

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Josh Lanyon
Murder
Mystery
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More quotes by Josh Lanyon

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Anyone who wasn't half-stoned on pain meds would have instantly realized what a really bad idea this plan was, but since that didn't include me, I didn't worry about it.
Josh Lanyon
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I’m not going to let go of you. I’m going to hold you all night. So go ahead and feel whatever you feel. If you’re still craving cocaine, go ahead. You’re safe. You can crave it all you want, but I won’t let go, and if you still feel like you can’t trust yourself in the morning, and it’s what you want, I’ll drive you to rehab myself. Okay? ~ Max
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Kevin refilled my plastic cup with more box wine. I smiled thanks. Kevin smiled welcome. Jake kicked my ankle.
Josh Lanyon
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To find them all in one package...well, perhaps better not to dwell on his package in my fragile state.
Josh Lanyon
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One thing I’ve noticed about getting older, it takes twice as much work to get half the results one formerly achieved by falling out of bed.
Josh Lanyon
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The only thing worse than opera is someone who hums along with opera.
Josh Lanyon
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Like true philosophers I've come to believe that religion is an illusion of childhood, outgrown after proper education.
Josh Lanyon
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And I thought maybe I didn't need to worry about my heart anymore because it had stopped beating a couple of seconds earlier, and I was still sitting there living and breathing-though admittedly I wasn't feeling much of anything.
Josh Lanyon
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I love you, Jake whispered. Are you strong enough for this? I made myself comfortable. Said over my shoulder, Sure. Would you tell me if you weren't? I grinned. Maybe. I can't think of a nicer way to commit suicide. That's good. I can't think of a more pleasant way to commit murder.
Josh Lanyon
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Kit, you're forty. You look thirty. You act...well, never mind. You're carrying on like you think you're seventy
Josh Lanyon
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I'm not insane. This is very simple, very straightforward. Provided he doesn't kill me, its foolproof.
Josh Lanyon
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When you live with a potentially life-threatening condition you get used to the thought of dying. You accept it, you push on. The thing that scared me was the picture of dying slowly and painfully, the loss of independence and identity to illness.
Josh Lanyon
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You don't look so hot, Adrien. Yeah, well I'm having a bad heart day. His upper lip curled in a semblance of a smile. Tell me about it.
Josh Lanyon
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He was probably selfish in the sack. Probably selfish and greedy and...unsophisticated. And hung like a horse.
Josh Lanyon
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Cops before breakfast.Before coffee even. As if Mondays weren't bad enough.
Josh Lanyon
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How did people get over this? They obviously did. Every day someone fell in love with the wrong person and had to pack up all their fragile, misguided hopes and unwanted affection, and move on to the next picnic table.
Josh Lanyon
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He looked okay. No, to be honest. He looked a lot better than okay. He looked...fine. Fine, as in get the Chiffons over here to sing a chorus.
Josh Lanyon
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Adrien, people get killed all the time. Since when is it your job to find out what happened to them? I'm not usually suspected of murdering them. You have been as long as I've known you.
Josh Lanyon
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You know that thing about Death Be Not Proud? Well, Fear Be Not Proud either. And Fear Be Not Elegant. What Fear be is stumbling, bumbling flight, crashing through brush, slip-sliding on pine needles, sloshing through puddles that are always deeper than you expect.
Josh Lanyon
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Drink your coffee -- people in Africa are sleeping.
Josh Lanyon