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There are very few good judges of humor, and they don't agree.

Josh Billings

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Josh Billings
Age: 67 †
Born: 1818
Born: April 21
Died: 1885
Died: October 14
Humorist
Writer
Lanesboro
Massachusetts
Henry Wheeler Shaw
Judging
Agree
Humor
Good
Judges

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Pedigrees seldom improve by age the grandson is too often a weak infringement on the grandsire's parent.
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Everybody in this world wants watching, but nobody more than ourselves.
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Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing till it gets there.
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We are ap tu hate them, who wont take our advice, and despise them who do.
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Menny think tha luv their husbands almost tew deth, when in fack, tha are only jealous ov them.
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It is a great deal easier for a man to find a pedigree to fit his virtues than virtues to fit his pedigree.
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Experience increases our wisdom but doesn't reduce our follies.
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Life is short, but it's long enough to ruin any man who wants to be ruined.
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Marrying a woman for her money is very much like setting a rat-trap, and baiting it with your own finger.
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Opinions should be formed with great caution, and changed with greater.
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Society is composed of slow Christians and wide-awake sinners.
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One legged chickens, I know, are the least apt to scratch a garden.
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A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself.
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About the only difference between the poor and the rich, is this, the poor suffer misery, while the rich have to enjoy it.
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As a general thing, when a woman wears the pants in a family, she has a good right to them.
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The man who gets bit twice by the same dog is better adapted for that kind of business than any other.
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It is easier to be virtuous than it is to appear so, and it pays better.
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Fuss is half-sister to hurry, and neither of them can do anything without getting in their own way.
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Early genius, like early cabbage, does not head well.
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There is only one good substitute for the endearments of a sister, and that is the endearments of some other fellow's sister.
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