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You can reach stupidity only with a cannon ball.

Josh Billings

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Josh Billings
Age: 67 †
Born: 1818
Born: April 21
Died: 1885
Died: October 14
Humorist
Writer
Lanesboro
Massachusetts
Henry Wheeler Shaw
Balls
Reach
Cannon
Cannons
Stupidity
Ball

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As a general thing, an individual who is neat in his person is neat in his morals.
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Pride seems tew be quite equally distributed the man who owns the carriage and the man who drives it seem tew have it just alike.
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Adam invented love at first sight, one of the greatest labor-saving machines the world ever saw.
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Metaphysics is the science of proving what we don't understand.
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The hardest thing any man can do is to fall down on the ice when it's slippery, and get up and praise the Lord.
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Occasions are rare and those, who know how to seize upon them, are rarer.
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Health is like money, we never have a true idea of its value until we lose it.
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Marrying a woman for her money is very much like setting a rat-trap, and baiting it with your own finger.
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No one can disgrace us but ourselves.
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Love is said to be blind, but I know some fellows in love who can see twice as much in their sweethearts as I do.
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Selfish people, with no heart to speak of, have the best time of it.
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The greatest thief this world has ever produced is procrastination, and he is still at large.
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It ain't because lovers are so sensitive that they quarrel so often it is because there is so much fun n the making up.
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I have never known a person to live to be one hundred and be remarkable for anything else.
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As the flint contains the spark, unknown to itself, which the steel alone can awaken to life, so adversity often reveals to us hidden gems, which prosperity or negligence would forever have hidden.
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Building air castles is a harmless business as long as you don't attempt to live in them.
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Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing those you hold well.
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There is no passion of the human heart that promises so much and pays so little as revenge.
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Society is composed of slow Christians and wide-awake sinners.
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Man was created a little lower than the angels and has been getting a little lower ever since.
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