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You can reach stupidity only with a cannon ball.

Josh Billings

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Josh Billings
Age: 67 †
Born: 1818
Born: April 21
Died: 1885
Died: October 14
Humorist
Writer
Lanesboro
Massachusetts
Henry Wheeler Shaw
Cannons
Stupidity
Ball
Balls
Reach
Cannon

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I do not know of a better cure for sorrow than to pity somebody else.
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Ignorance ain't not knowin' stuff ignorance is knowin' stuff that AIN'T TRUE.
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The great art of writing is knowing when to stop.
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I called my cat William because no shorter name fits the dignity of his character. Poor old man, he has fits now, so I call him Fitz-William.
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There are people so addicted to exaggeration that they actually can't tell the truth without lying.
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Early genius, like early cabbage, does not head well.
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It ain't no disgrace for a man to fall, but to lie there and grunt is.
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A witty writer is like a porcupine his quill makes no distinction between friend and foe.
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As long as we are lucky we attribute it to our smartness our bad luck we give the gods credit for.
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Life is short, but it's long enough to ruin any man who wants to be ruined.
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Hunting after happiness is like hunting after a lost sheep in the wilderness--when you find it, the chances are that it is a skeleton.
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Successful writers learn at last what they should learn at first,--to be intelligently simple.
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Genuine laughing is the vent of the soul, the nostrils of the heart, and just as necessary for health and happiness as spring water is for a trout.
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When good-natured people leave us we look forward with extra pleasure to their return.
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True valor is like honesty it enters into all that a man sees and does.
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The man who has never been tempted doesn't know how dishonest he is.
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When the truth is in your way, you are on the wrong road.
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Silence never makes any blunders.
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Dr. Holmes says, both wittily and truly, that crying widows are easiest consoled.
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Woman's influence is powerful, especially when she wants something.
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