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Plenty of folks are so contrary that if they should fall into the river, they would insist upon floating upstream.

Josh Billings

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Josh Billings
Age: 67 †
Born: 1818
Born: April 21
Died: 1885
Died: October 14
Humorist
Writer
Lanesboro
Massachusetts
Henry Wheeler Shaw
Upon
Upstream
Fall
Insist
Would
Floating
River
Plenty
Contrary
Rivers
Folks

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If mankind were only just what they pretend to be, the problem of the millennium would be immediately solved.
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There is a significant Latin proverb to wit: Who will guard the guards?
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Reason often makes mistakes, but conscience never does.
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It's not ignorance does so much damage it's knowin' so derned much that ain't so.
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Words are often seen hunting for an idea, but ideas are never seen hunting for words.
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Silence is one of the hardest arguments to refute.
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A learned fool is one who has read everything and simply remembered it.
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Take the humbug out of this world, and you haven't much left to do business with.
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I called my cat William because no shorter name fits the dignity of his character. Poor old man, he has fits now, so I call him Fitz-William.
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[Science is] the literature of truth.
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I have never known a person to live to be one hundred and be remarkable for anything else.
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The happiest time in any man's life is when he is in red-hot pursuit of a dollar with a reasonable prospect of overtaking it.
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Wisdom has never made a bigot, but learning has.
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Politeness is better than logic. You can often persuade when you cannot convince.
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Admiration is a youthful fancy will which scarcely ever survives to mature years.
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